I'm a woman in Texas. I'm married and have a school-aged child. I have a medical background. I'm quite liberal, socially. I love helping people with medical, parenting, and social questions. Don't ask me about tech stuff or finances, because I need advice on those things myself!
Gender: Female
Location: Texas
Age: 34
Member Since: December 17, 2006
Answers: 795
Last Update: September 2, 2007
Visitors: 50060
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Xenolan
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wel im 19 and trying out for a job as a secretary. these jobs are veri high paying. i have been to 5 interviews so far, the first one fell through even tho i thort i was really good but apparently he wanted more. so in the next one i gave the boss a blowjob (he had already promised i would get the job if i did), but he went against his word and didnt. the next two bosses i did the same, and did it to comletion like before, but they kept going against their word and not giving me the job. the last guy i had sex with, thinking other girls would probably have done that, but he still refused after. what am i doing wrong?! help. (link)
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What are you doing wrong? Any above-board career opportunity does not require a blowjob as an interview exam. By giving sexual favors, you have hurt yourself as a serious candidate for employment. People do not give seuxal favors in order to get a job!
If someone hires you after getting sexual favors from you, he then opens things up so you may demand a continuing relationship, further favors like a company car, or whatever. By not hiring you now, he doesn't have to worry that you'll get ticked off later, when there's more evidence, and go to his boss or his wife.
What I suggest you do is get real skills. If you already have real skills, keep job interviews focused on your qualifications. I'm not a preacher and I definitely think that most people have to define morality for themselves, so I won't lecture you about how wrong it is to trade sex for favors, but I will tell you that when something is so clearly not working in your life it's time to rethink your approach.
Maybe you could take college classes and aspire to be something other than an administrative assistant, even.
Sabine
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i have recently read the book "forever" by judy blume i really liked it.
dose anyone know any good books simmilar ? (link)
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Look up Judy Blume. She has a great selection of adolescent literature. When I was your age, I really liked Tiger Eye by Judy Blume. What you can do to find more books by her is go to Amazon.com
and type in Forever Judy Blume. Look at the listing of her books as well as the ones that say "people who bought this also bought..." and that will show you more authors being sought-out by those who enjoyed Forever. I also like the works of Cynthia Rinaldi, specifically, Wolf by the Ears. One thing I definitely recommmend is for you to go to your local public library and speak with a children's or teen librarian. They are always full of helpful ideas whether you want things like the graphic novels or romances or reference books.
Good luck,
Sabine
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do your teeth grow bigger as you grow older?
yeah its a dumb question but just answear it cuz i need to know (link)
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Your teeth are formed in your jaw and they stay the same physical size other than two factors: first, they can appear to grow longer because the tooth is pushed up from the root. They can appear longer if your gums recede. Second, they can grow shorter through wear and tear, especially as you grind them.
However, after they've erupted from your gums, they are not going to get wider or thicker or longer, but they may shift positions, turn, and more of the tooth can be exposed at different times.
Sabine
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ok i was playing dodgeball in athletics at school (it was a different type tho) and when you get out you have to sit down but you can hit someone in and get back in. so anyways i was on the ground and i threw a ball and my hand kept going and SLAMMED into the ground and it hurt soooooooo bad. that was in 1st period and now it's 5:14 and it still hurts the same. it's ok if i just do nothing, but if i touch it it hurts. also the bottom of my nail is bluish-purple.
do you know if it's broken?
i can move it, but im thinking it might be cracked - it's at the top half of my thumb. (link)
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So you smacked it on the floor or the ground outside and the bruise is at the nail rather than the knuckle?
There's no truth to the idea that you can't move your body if there's a broken bone. It can move - it just hurts. You wouldn't be able to move it a certain way if there were a problem with the tendon or ligament. It's certainly possible that you've broken it. That bone, in an adult, is usually just
about 1/4 to 1/2 inch long and it's thin.
Did you speak with a parent about it? Going in to the doctor is kind of iffy. I mean that if you go in and it's broken they might have to just put it in a splint so it can heal on its own or, if it's not only broken, but the bones are separated, they might need to do surgery. Because it's probably in your dominant hand and you kind of need that for writing, etc., I'd definitely be careful. Is it swollen and red in addition to the bruise at the base of the nail?
Here's what I'd do:
1)talk to a parent-type so s/he can see how bad it is
2) Fill a baggie with ice and wrap it in a towel. Apply the ice pack to your hand at least 30 minutes at a time every few hours.
2) Take Ibuprofen, 400 mg now and every 4 hours. Even if not for the pain and tenderness, take it because it helps reduce the swelling. Of course, don't take it if you have any reason not to, like asthma or allergy to aspirin
If your parent doesn't think it's too serious, maybe wait until tomorrow to see what happens, but if it's not better by Monday, I'd make an appointment to see a doctor. Hand injuries are delicate because we need our hands so much. If you break your leg and it heals wrong, there are problems with walking, etc., but if your hand is damaged, you can't write, type, brush your teeth, etc. A hand injury can be very disabling.
Anyway, I wish I could be there to see it and give you better advice. Take care of yourself and I hope you feel better soon.
If you feel like it, let me know how it all works out.
Sabine
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me and my mom havent been talking to eachother for the last few days
and when i try we always end up yelling at eachother
it started because she got out of work early to see me at my track meet and i kinda told her to leave
i know it was mean and i regret it
But i dont think apoligizing will work?
is there any ideas ?? (link)
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You said you don't think apologizing will work, but have you tried it? "I'm sorry" goes a long way in healing wounded feelings. You admit that what you did was wrong. Maybe you always end up yelling at each other because you're trying to explain why you did what you did and she's interpreting that as you refusing to recognize what you did is wrong. The next time you see your mom, I suggest that you say right away "Mom, I was wrong and I'm sorry." If she needs to vent, I suggest you listen calmly and without arguing. Tell her you didn't mean to hurt her and yet you know you did and you're sorry. Ask her for her forgiveness. Don't offer her any excuses.
I hope it goes well.
Sabine
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I think I might be pregnant. I also think I am too early along to get a pregnancy test.
However, my breasts are sore.
So here are my questions (they are all related so it's cool they are in one topic):
How long after conception can you take a pregnancy test?
How long after conception do your breasts get sore?
Can sore breasts just be a sign that I am about to be menstrating? I usually don't have very many symptoms, but I took something with hormones so maybe it is just worse premenstral symptoms?
Any help is appreciated (link)
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While I agree to some extent with the previous advisor, I'd like to chime in on a few things. A missed period is not a sure sign of pregnancy. Some pregnant women have spotting which they mistake for a period and some women lose their periods without being pregnant due to other reasons. Sore breasts could be from PMS (you might be more in tune to your body this month if you think you might be preg), hormone fluctuations from the medications, or possibly pregnancy. There's no way to tell without the test, really. And even the over-the-counter ones can give both false-positive and false-negative results. Doctors tell a few ways. On internal exam, your uterus is tipped or anteverted and your cervix is a bluish color. You have a hormone called beta human choriandogonadotrophin bHCG at an elevated level showing that your body is making cells and hormones to nourish a fetus. The last is by doing an ultrasound to visualize a new growth (the fetus and it's accompanying placenta) in your uterus.
I don't know whether you want to be pregnant, but you should at this point assume that you probably are. That means getting plenty of folic acid so that the fetus does not develop birth defects. Give your body the rest it needs. And if you decide you do not want the baby, you should start thinking and discussing with your partner the options of parenting, adoption, and abortion.
But take the pee test and if you don't get your period soon, take it again. Go to the doctor if you miss a period and your next one is late even if the pregnancy test is negative because this can be the sign of a troubled pregnancy, such as one that implants outside the uterus.
My thoughts are with you.
Sabine
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I'm going to college soon and I have scholarships for tuition, but how do you get scholarships or your future college to pay for room and board? (link)
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Yeah, the school's financial aid office can point you in the direction of available scholarships, grants, and loans. In addition, you should ask about work-study programs. There's also usually the option of working in the dining halls to get your dorm and food paid or mostly paid.
Best wishes.
Sabine
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Can anyone tell me what this statistic means??
More young black men are murdered each year than were willed in all the decades of lynching.
Thanks so much! (link)
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Well, that's just a statement. A statistic necessarily involves numbers.
What it means is that someone is saying that during the decades of lynching young black men (which happened mostly in the South around the turn of the century and for crimes as minor as whistling at a while woman) a certain number of young black men were killed through lynching. Let's call that X. So there has to be a cut-off point. Like young black men's deaths from the lynching decades (1900 through 1960 just to make something up) = X.
That number is exceeded by the number of young black men who are killed today by means other than lynching. So for every modern year, the number of young black men who are killed is greater than X, which is the total of all of the deaths during the 'lynching years'.
It seems to be saying that lynching is sensational. That it wasn't really such a big deal. The truth is that first, more young black men are killed today because there are a lot more young black men today. There are more born and more survive childhood than during the lynching decades. So plain numbers "more individuals" doesn't mean as much as it would mean if they said one in 100 black men was lynched in the past (made up number) and now one in 50 black men is killed these days. Plus, it's hard to equate 'lynching' with killing. Lynching was an illegal mob activity where young black men were kidnapped and killed (usually hung from a tree) without a trail by an angry mob of white people. What they're saying about black men 'killed' today could include the number of black men killed by black-on-black violence, gang wars, or even killed by auto accidents.
This 'statistic' is vague in many ways and ends up being provocative without really saying anything factual.
Sabine
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about how much would it cost to fix an approx. 6 inch scratch on the side of an '01 infiniti? i have insurance but the dedectuble isnt paid yet soo... (link)
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Depends on a few things, like how deep the scratch is (how many coats of paint you've gone through). The dealer may have touch-up paint that would do. If not, you just have to take it in to a body repair shop and ask for an estimate.
Sabine
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There are 33 days of school left, and I have to either sign up for my 8th grade year to go to the same school... or the one I've been trying to go to all along. Let's call my current school A, and the other school, B.
I've heard from my brother's best friend's dad to always stay with my parokial education because it will get me a more successful future and job. But... I'm at the point where I either choose the school that's healthier for my relationships, or my future. Now, since one of my best friends transfered to B last year and I miss him so much I really want to go there. Plus I HATE 2 of the teachers at my current school, A.
I have my two best friends at the school, A. And I'd really miss them. But lately, I've been feeling so neglected by them. So I'm leaning towards B. Whenever I leave them to go get ready for class while I'm getting my books, they'll start talking with or about me. When I come back, they'll both be laughing hysterically -and it seems like fake laughing sometimes- and they won't stop until I come back. Then they both fake stone faces and I ask what was funny and they're like, "Oh, nothing."
Like recently at gym, they were talking and I went up to them and was like
"What's bothering you?" to Lindsay because she was acting upset. And she's like, "Oh nothing. You would just lecture me... so... " I never lecture her and she's always asking me for advice. Dunno what her problem is. I missed the dance last Friday, and she started talking about it and she looked at her arm and then my other friend Kristen said, "Hey yeah, she didn't want you to see what happened to her arm because she thought you'd make fun of it." And I'm like, what the heck? I would never do that! And she knows I'm not that type of person. And then right before class she told me she hates rich people. And I'm rich. So I'm totally leaning towards B... but then again, let's not get too far into my social life with this please.
Anyways,
I've been friends with one of them for almost a year and the other for NINE YEARS. I can't throw that away and it'd be hard to go to a parokial highschool after 8th grade in a public school.
Which school should I GO TO!?
A or B?
I'm so confused.
And someone I love goes there.
He's one of my BEST FRIENDS BUT I DON'T KNOW if he feels the same way!
I know I shouldn't transfer because of that but I have to take some risks in life if I ever want to get together with him.
13/f
What should I do? (link)
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Well, let's see, at school A you have some really nasty "best friends" and an inferior education to look forward to. At school B you have a good friend and the potential for a better education.
This is a no-brainer. You need to address your current and future needs and transfer. Do you really think you'll still be in contact with those best friends when you're 25? Maybe. But you'll definitely be benefitting from the best education you can get at 25 and even at 75. There's also the networking aspect of it. In good schools you meet people who are more likely to be successful and have the connections to get you started in a good career, etc.
I'll admit that I'm biased, as an education snob, but I think this is an easy choice. Parochial school.
You may see your current schoolmates around town or see them socially. Hopefully, they'll start maturing and find someone else's mind with whom to mess.
Sabine
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my friend is at the hospitial.. something to do with her ovaries bursting?
what does that mean? (link)
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There are a few things this could mean. Most likely, she had a fluid-filled cyst on her ovary and the cyst burst open. That can really hurt. The reason her ovary itself might burst are three: one, if she had an infection and the ovary ruptured, two, if she had a cyst form inside the ovary and then become too big and the ovary burst, or, three, if she had an ectopic pregancy (in the fallopian tube). In the third case, it'd be her fallopian tube, not her ovary itself, that burst most likely. However, by far, the most likely is that she had an ovarian cyst burst.
Sometimes surgery is required to fix those. Sometimes they can prevent more cysts with birth control pills.
Please let me know if you need anything else.
Sabine
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Hi. I am a 16 year old student who has a Anatomy and Physiology Exam coming up in about two weeks...and I'm not ready. I just found out recently that I have a 70 in his class. He doesn't give extra credit and we haven't been doing any quizzes or test in his class lately. I really need to pull up my grade. Last progress report, i had a 79, so I am wondering how it dropped so low.....so fast. Anyways, i was wondering if anybody here is really good at Anatomy and Physiology and could help me out. Like, I was wondering if maybe someone could help me study, or give me some study tricks about science....anything would really help. My AOL(Instant Messenger) name is DramaQ162, so please hit me back if you can. I really appreciate it.
-Spoolie21 (link)
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Good thing you still have two weeks. Are you near a college? The thing that will do you the absolute most good, if you're like everyone else I've known who's taken anatomy, is to go to the college bookstore and buy Anatomy and Physiology flashcards. Use them every spare chance you get. If your college has a nursing school, ask someone who works at the bookstore for any tools that have nmemonics or other ways of helping memorize the insertions of the muscles, etc. Form a study group, if you can, and quiz your classmates and have them quiz you. Ask your classmates whether they have any tricks to remember the material.
Good luck. I'm rooting for you!
Sabine
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what is a vagina? pussy? (link)
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The vagina is the opening between a woman's legs. It leads to the uterus. It is also called the birth canal. The "pussy" can refer to that as well as the labia, the urinary meatus (where one pees), the perineum (the space between the vagina and the anus), the clitoris, and the mound of venus, love bump, or pubic symphysis, which is the raised, bony area on the groin at the bottom of the abdomen.
Sabine
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I keep getting these really bad charlie horses in my legs. Like, sometimes it'll even wake me up. And then I can barely walk the next day because the muscles ache so bad. Does anyone have any advice on how to ease the pain or even help prevent them? Anything at all would be a great help. Thanks!! (link)
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Potassium! You need to make sure you have enough potassium in your diet. You can get potassium from many fresh fruits and vegetables, but most notably from bananas, strawberries, and avacadoes. Other than that, stretches are good. When I'm having a charlie horse, what helps is to pull my toes toward my shin and keep that muscle stretched for a few seconds before releasing.
Leg pains are a very common "growing pain" which people experience when they're adding height. It's not unusual. I hope these tips help.
Sabine
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How do i get my grandma from playing bingo (link)
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Okay, seriously, playing bingo can be a problem for seniors, and not even just to the extent that it keeps them from doting on grandchildren. There are fees involved and sometimes people can get a bad gambling habit and can spend more money than they should and play until it's unhealthy. Gambling can even be a side-effect of medication for diseases like Parkinson's.
What needs to happen is that someone needs to take your grandmother to the doctor to discuss her gambling problem and her behavior. The doctor can help figure out whether it's a medical issue and whether something can be done about it.
Sabine
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for homework i have to be creative which i am not, and create a spanish holiday
can anybody give me some ideas?
i'd really appreciate it =] (link)
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sillyrob, that IS silly. Most kids are out of school by June 17th.
So, how about taking a character from Spanish literature and celebrating that character's day? Like you could take Cervantes' (he's Mexican, I think, but it's in Spanish) character Don Quixote and make a holiday surrounding his deeds.
Imagination only works when it's used frequently. So if you don't feel creative, try a few things and it may really get your juices flowing.
Sabine
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today i just got birth control from my doctor called yaz and i didn't get it to prevent pregnacy i got it for irrgeluair periods.
anyways my question is before i start taking this some people have told me it will make me gain wieght is that true?
and will it make my breast bigger?
(link)
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teenadvice is wrong. You spoke with your doctor, who went to a lot of school, in order to find the best solution for your problem. I think it's teetering dangerously close to abuse for an advicinator to tell you that a whole class of prescription medicine is not good and to advise you not to follow your doctor's recommendations.
Here's a patient information site for Yaz. Its side-effect profile does include fluid retention, but does not mention weight-gain specifically. Neither does it address the idea of Yaz contributing to the development of breast tissue. Usually, OCPs (birth control pills) are thought not to affect development.
The best advice that I or anyone can give you is to call your doctor and ask him/her about your questions. The doctor knows for sure.
Sabine
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okay my column is messed up. i don't want it to be so wide that you have to scroll to the left & right like it is right now. heres's my column.
http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?u=redhead6154
anyone know how to fix it? it's really annoying.
i've tried different backgrounds already. it doesn't change. & my picture isn't that big so i don't think that could have anything to do with it.
help? (link)
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Actually, there is a way to fix it. What you need to do is find the answer with the long URL. Then, go in and edit that answer, breaking up the URL with a return. Then your column should return to normal.
Sabine
As per your request: When you see the Advicinators' page, you should see the column on the left with the following categories "Get Advice" "Give Advice" and "Welcome [Your Advicinator Name". If you're with me so far, you should see one of the options is "Edit Answers" under the Welcome category. You click on that. Then you find the answer with the long URL, click "Edit answer" on the bottom, and then go in and edit the text by putting the link in the correct place.
I know that the other advice you received was to use TinyURL and that's also a good way to go. I break up my URLs because it's a simple matter to cut and paste them back together and probably the person whom you advised has already seen the URL. It's just there for posterity now, so if anyone wants to see it, they can spend a few seconds reconstructing the link. Or TinyURL would work well, too. I'm just lazy, I guess.
Good luck.
Sabine
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16/f
okay so im a virgin and my lips of my vagina are all like red and swollen and it's really irritated. when i walk it burns and hurts. what is it and what can i do to get rid of it? i can't go to a doctor though so any at home help?? (link)
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Why can't you go to a doctor, dear? That's what you need. Anything else we could tell you here would be a guess.
Some things you can do are to keep the area clean with warm water washing. Do not use any soap. If you have some cortisone cream, that might help with the swelling. You can use corn starch if you think it's a problem with chafing. Avoid tight jeans, underpants with synthetic fiber crotches, pantyhose, and activities that would irritate that area, like horseback riding or riding a bicycle.
If you have pain in your abdomen, near your bladder or foul-smelling or discolored disharge, you definitely need to see a doctor.
I feel for you and hope you can take care of this.
Sabine
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I have heard that if you smoke weed it is visible through drug tests for 6 months. Is this true if you only try it once? Also, I am a freshman in high school. Is there and times when it is mandatory to have a physical? I remember when I was going into Jr. High it was mandatory. When they take a urine sample for physicals, what are they testing for? drugs? I also heard if you take Airborne right after you smoke weed, it is invisible to the urine drug test.
Any answers to these questions?
Please no bashing.
Thanks. :) (link)
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When I was working as an office nurse, we'd do a urinalysis to look for blood, protein, white cells, glucose, and other markers of disease or infection. We didn't look for drugs unless it was specifically ordered by the doctor. We had to have consent from the parent and/or the student if there was a need for drug screening.
The question of whether a physical is required is up to your school, generally.
I don't know about Airborne. I have heard that Goldenseal root can help clear pot from the system.
Good luck.
Sabine
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