Free AdviceGet Free Advice
Home | Get advice | Give advice | Topics | Columnists | - !START HERE! -
Make Suggestions | Sitemap

Get Advice


Search Questions

Ask A Question

Browse Advice Columnists

Search Advice Columnists

Chat Room

Give Advice

View Questions
Search Questions
Advice Topics

Login

Username:
Password:
Remember me
Register for free!
Lost Password?

Want to give Advice?

Sign Up Now
(It's FREE!)

Miscellaneous

Shirts and Stuff
Page Backgrounds
Make Suggestions
Site News
Link To Us
About Us
Terms of Service
Help/FAQ
Sitemap
Contact Us


Covid-19.


Question Posted Friday July 31 2020, 3:29 pm

I live in a house with an 85-year-old who had cancer surgery in March and a 64-year-old mother, a brother in his 30's and a small child. I have been very careful to wear a mask and gloves and obey for the past 5 months every health stipulation to do with Covid-19.

Not to get political because the disease is not a political thing but in the U.S. they've rushed things in some states and the president hasn't helped by denying the existance of it at first and not trusting the experts like Fauci.

One of the things that has led to surge of cases is reopening bars, night clubs and virtually every other business you can think of in some areas. Doing so has resulted in spike of cases and some deaths.

Meanwhile, I live in Canada where they've closed the border and until recently you couldn't even gather with more than 5 people at a time. What has happened here is that there's 4 stages of reopening. We just entered Stage 3 which allows nearly all attractions, movie theaters and bars to reopen.

I have ZERO interest in bars, nightclubs, performance venues, indoor restaurant dining or any establishment that could be a breading ground for the disease.

I would just like to go downtown to the aquarium or even to the park, a museum or anything having been holed up here for 5 months with the same people.

My mother refuses to let me go anywhere but Wal-Mart or the corner store and always asks me where I'm going or if I want to kill my father and everyone else in the house by dragging Covid-19 in. It's an enormous guilt trip and I would like to have my freedom back. I get that she's paranoid and the reason for it and that she thinks things will end up like America. We've taken months to reach where we are and health experts have got us here.

I'm not trying to be selfish but I think if health experts have required businesses and attractions to submit a proposal for opening and are adhering to strict rules that it's not an issue to visit these places if you have a mask, gloves and are being bloody careful.

The only indoor venue I would want to go to that is iffy is a movie theater but not until I knew nobody who went to one here became ill. They have limited occupancy to 50 people per screen and blocked off seats and entire sections in the theaters and it's all reserved. You have to wear mask and gloves the entire time you are there.

I'm hoping you will have ideas on what I can do to get her to see that while nothing is 100% safe that this is as good as it gets and public health can shut businesses down for non-compliance with rules.

She also doesn't want me to go to parks for exercise or large ones downtown with a zoo or take public transit anywhere. I can understand the transit part but being outdoors is important.

I'm more concerned for my own mental health than anything else because these are the only 5 people I have interacted with other than my aunt for months and have been holed up in my room otherwise. I need to get out of this place.

Before Covid-19 I was going to theater, comedy clubs, major attractions and movies. It was incredibly difficult for me when that ceased and I had to find other outlets and things to do from home. You can't stay sheltered in one place for too long.


[ Answer this question ]
Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Health?


Danicus answered Friday July 31 2020, 10:52 pm:
They are understandably scared for their lives. Especially old and recovering. What if you go out, you catch it and kill the 2 old people, it doesn't only kill the old. What if, the guy with the kid dies and now the kid is doesn't have a dad? I know this is not what you want to hear, but it out there...

A 37 year old marine friend of mine got it and was hospitalized, my step father got it and it was mild. One of my cousins got it and didn't know. They had a little get together and now their whole family has it. Only 1 person got it really bad but it got like 10 people sick.

So its entirely possible that you catch it if you're not careful and give it to everyone in the house.

You gotta understand that they are convinced that if they get it, they'll likely die. (my mom is old and has pre-existing conditions and she's just as paranoid). So they're afraid and thus make such demands of you. Though, you can just got out for a walk in your neighborhood and you're probably fine. Sunshine is good for the immune system too. Just avoid crowded places. I'm sure you've seen on the news that some young people don't care about it and gather, then it ends up spreading like wildfire. But the ones that end up suffering are the older people in their lives that they interact with.

Given that they are afraid of dying because of covid, I don't think its out of the question that they want to control you. Though, walking around the neighborhood for exercise should totally be fine so long as you stay away from where people go. Maybe you can at least convince them of letting you walk around your neighborhood. One good trick to try to convince someone to give you what you want, is to ask for something way bigger first, then when they say no, bring up what you really wanted. By comparison it will be a much smaller request and so they might grant it.

Yes it sucks, but yes it would be selfish to go out and unnecessarily expose yourself because you're bored. You could accidentally kill them cause you wanna go out and have fun. Even if it doesn't kill the person, they could have permanent organ damage. Is whatever it is you wanna go do, worth the risk? Not to them.

So, probably the only way to do what you want is to move out. If you can't, find a way not to go crazy staying at home. Reading, exercising at home, doing something creative or learning a skill or instrument would take up your time and keep your mind occupied. If you wanna interact with people there's always chatrooms. I used to use one a long time ago that didn't need registration. "chat-avenue" but like all chatrooms, there's a lot of crap and you gotta find one without spammers and annoying people. Sorry, but you gotta look out for your old people, even if it means you gotta change your life temporarily to keep them safe.

[ Danicus's advice column | Ask Danicus A Question
]


More Questions:

<<< Previous Question: Covid-19: What can I do to keep from going Stir Crazy?
Next Question >>> I want to share my story

Recent popular questions:
Want to give advice?

Click here to start your own advice column!

What happened here with my gamer friends?

All content on this page posted by members of advicenators.com is the responsibility those individual members. Other content © 2003-2014 advicenators.com. We do not promise accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of any advice and are not responsible for content.

Attention: NOTHING on this site may be reproduced in any fashion whatsoever without explicit consent (in writing) of the owner of said material, unless otherwise stated on the page where the content originated. Search engines are free to index and cache our content.
Users who post their account names or personal information in their questions have no expectation of privacy beyond that point for anything they disclose. Questions are otherwise considered anonymous to the general public.

[Valid RSS] eXTReMe Tracker