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Dealing with a narcissist
Hello,
Do you have any experience dealing with narcissistic parents? I find myself needing to talk to someone who has been through this.
If not then thanks for your time!
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
I don't but I became friends with new neighbors only to find something was really wrong. The husband was narcissistic and didn't care who really saw him cus I guess those plagued with this mental illness do not see their behavior as wrong. I spent enough time with the wife to see him get angry, like from zero to 100 in seconds and saw him yelling right in front of me at his wife demanding she take off her wedding ring and put it on the table which she did to get him to calm down. He took it and threw it into the backyard. One time after dinner, my ex and I went to visit while I was still married, they were about to have dinner and I was not hungry and this time he turned on me and demanded I stay and have dinner after pouring each of us a glass of wine. I looked at my husband for help when the man starting yelling cus i said I'd already eaten and wasn't hungry. He said he knew what was good for me and i needed to eat. He wasn't listening to what I said. My husband who had his own mental health issues sat as if nothing was going on. Then when the man got to within a yard of me shaking his fist all of a sudden, I freaked and shucked my glass of wine at him which hit his face mostly and stopped him long enough for me to leave without my husband, he threatened to call the police so I drove to a park and hung out there til bedtime and then came home. I never associated with them again.
From what little I'd read about narcissism, people with it do not live with good relationships. In marriage, it always breaks up. From seeing what that guy treated his wife like, it got me realizing i couldn't go on forever either as my ex was verbally abusive. It was small part of what helped me to leave and get a divorce. Unfortunately, if you are a child, you can't just walk away from such a relationship. Even my ex never thought there was anything wrong with himself so people like that are not prone to go for help. As I see it,, there are two choices for you, neither is good and there is nothing you can do as a child that will fix them or make them more reasonable to get along with. Once you are 18 you are an adult and can leave them and that is something that you may want to make plans for, finding someone else to live with while you go to college or work. So choice number one is you stay at home, read books on what to expect from living with a narcissistic person(s) and put up with it until you are old enough to leave, or choice number two is speaking to school counselors, talking to a local pastor, priest if you don't have one and letting them know what your situation is if you come to a point you can't handle it, and see what they can do to give some positive input and love into your life which is missing. I suppose some narcisstic people can have their tempers go out of control and actually vent by physically hurting you and you have to tell someone like those I have mentioned. At some point they may call children protective agencies and they will investigate. You may go into temporary foster care unless a relative you trust can take you in who will not allow your parents to see you. THe agency will see to your parents getting the help they need. These days, they are all for rehabilitating parents to the point it is safe for the child to go back to them and do so especially with mental patients who are on meds and take them religiously. So you don't have to worry there. But you have to tell people, not your peers as they are in no position to help. However if you have a best friend and feel their parents care about you, you might want to tell your friends Mom and see if you can spend more time there if possible or if they are willing to take you in if parents are getting help and the clearance to have you back at home, or as a place to go live once you turn 18. The only kids who can get away from home sooner are those who at 16 can prove to a court that they can sustain themselves, have a job and place to live and can take care of all their own needs and then become legally emancipated and live on their own without any interferance from parents but there are few who are able to do that.
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