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I slept with someone who's dating another person
26/f
Let's call him Danny.
I met Danny through my sister. My sister and I were taking a group of people out of town and Danny was one of those people. Danny was on that trip with a girl he was dating.
According to the girl, they had only known each other for two weeks and were dating for only one. For some reason, I thought it was a red flag because based on seeing how things went, it looked like it was moving really quickly.
Danny told me he did not think it was pressured to move that quickly and it just seemed natural to do it that way. He liked how she didn't want to change him, etc. Also, let me mention that he said this when he was sober.
Danny challenged me to drink more than him for some reason. I did not want to do it, but then he called me out of the group chat and I thought because of his "big ego" he needed to be knocked down a peg or two, so I accepted the challenge. The one thing I noticed while this challenge was happening, he was hanging around me and the other people more than he was hanging out with the girl he was dating. Because of that, I kept redirecting him back to her (she does not drink).
Toward the end of the night, I noticed that he was borderline flirting with me. He would make certain comments and ask me where I was. When my sister sent him and the girl home, he was texting me asking me where I was, etc.
The next day, things were back to normal. We weren't really talking but I noticed that even though he was next to her, he would message me. Nothing inappropriate, though.
When the trip was over and we were all back in the same city, he was still messaging me. He told me if he wasn't dating the girl, he wouldn't have met me and the other amazing people on the trip. He also said if he WASN'T dating her and he somehow managed to have met me beforehand, he would've hit on me.
Fast forward to later on that week, because he "lost" the competition, he wanted a rematch. Because he's helping my sister find a job in his company, I wanted to be nice so I accepted to go out again. He invited his friend out, as well.
The night started off with us two, and it ended with us two. I remember snippets of what had happened. I remember him kissing me and telling me that he liked me. I remember him saying he told his friend I wasn't feeling well and that he was going to take me home. I remember that we did have sex--yes, it was consensual. I remember us having sex twice.
I woke up the next morning and we both had a hangover. I don't know if we were both still drunk but it seemed like as everything started to clear up, things got awkward. I tried to be as normal as possible, no matter how uncomfortable I had felt.
I know he wanted to do it again before I made him get up and out of bed. And after we were out of bed and we got dressed, we grabbed some food because I thought he needed it since he wasn't feeling too well. We spoke here and there the remaining of that day.
And since then, we haven't spoken. I don't know if it's because he felt guilty, or if he got what he wanted. But I'm having a hard time processing the whole thing. I know it was a mistake and both parties are both at fault.
Let me clarify that I have no interest in dating him. I knew there was something about him that was off, and I was trying to figure out what it was because everyone kept saying he was really nice to people, but for some reason he was mean to me/picking on me.
Part of me wants to know what he's thinking and why the sudden change of talking to me--does he feel guilty? What was he thinking the whole time? What should I do? I want to speak with him about what happened but at the same time, I want to forget that it even happened and move on.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Forget it ever happened. And next time, do not accept any challenge from another person, especially a guy flirting with you. He wanted to get you drunk for a reason. This guy sounds nasty and a real player. Just forget him.
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