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He is sending me mixed signals..
Hi I'm 18 F .. The guy I like is 23. We know each other about a month now. We met each other at my birthday party and after that we just started talking. I like him but I'm not inlove with him. He told me he likes me and after that he just wants to be friends. But he is the first one to say hi and sometimes he complements me and so on. He keeps telling me that he just wants to be friends and although I'm not inlove with him it still hurts.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Do you believe there is only one kind of "Like"?
There are two that I know of, Like as in stating a preference for something or appreciation for something as in "I like chocolate chip mint icecream" (cus its a favorite) or "I like the way my grandma cooks pot roast because I am a picky eater."
The other "Like" is what people state when they are interested in someone, attracted to them and want to start hanging out and progress towards dating or start dating right away.
So when he said he likes you, he may appreciate some things about you as a person and enjoy you as a friend but may not at this point or maybe not ever develop deeper feelings like Love.
Guys don't toss around the word "Love" right at the beginning of meeting a girl unless they are a very needy person or if they are trying to trick her to just get into her pants. Yes, I know theres such a thing as Love at first sight but it is so very rare and very unlikely so don't get hopes up.
If you are not in love with him, then do you at least value him as a friend? If so, there really isn't a problem unless he decides in the future to tell you he's in love with you and you need to convey that you don't feel the same.
There are no mixed signals just by the words you say were spoken. But then I wasn't there to watch for any body language that would reveal much more than just words can. Body language will tell the truth even if a person is lying or not speaking at all.
I think the real issue here to focus on is WHy it hurts you that he just wants to be friends? I don't mean to hurt you but there may be something you need to deal with so that you are no longer affected by a situation like this.
To show the big difference that self confidence can make, when I was on a dating site, (how I met my 2nd husband) I was in my 40's, so no spring chicken any longer and I learned from a bad first marriage what I would not tolerate in the next guy. So I was very specific, spelling out what I was looking for and shared everything about myself, the good and the areas I needed to work on, and told the guys, they could ask anything, and nothing would offend me, I'd be an open book and answer whatever they wanted to know. But it wasn't their approval I was looking for and said that I would rather let them see and know everything they wanted right off the bat so if they didn't like what they discovered, they could walk away and it wouldn't hurt my feelings. And it didn't. I did not want to be hooked up with a guy who only felt so-so about me. I'd already had even worse. You are 18 and just starting the dating circuit. Don't wait for a guy to come after you cus he likes the way you look but he may not be right for you. Don't accept an invite to become just any guys girlfriend because you want a boyfriend or future husband so badly. Thats the wrong reason for going with a guy. Its much better if like myself, you write a list of what you are looking for in a guy. LIsten to your girlfriends when they complain about their boyfriends. Do you really want someone who is indifferent, doesnt talk much if you do, never does anything special for you, doesn't support and encourage you and compliment, etc..... Make a list and keep adding to it. Must haves on the list are things you absolutely won't settle for less on, or it is a deal breaker and you won't date him. A column of prefences is good too but these would not be deal breakers, such as my liking a guy with long hair. If I met the right guy and he didn't have long hair, I'd still go with him. But I did by chance find the right guy and he has long hair.
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hey.. it seems like he doesnt know what he wants because there's guys like that they have a girl guessing but your guys are still young just keep it in the friendzone and if someone else comes along go for it and stay friends with the other.if he really cares about you he would let you know but by then it would be too late cause yo u would be with someone else.
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