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Do you think she has unresovled feelings for me?
We known each other for about a year now. We met on social media, we've facetime a few times including live chats with other viewers last year. We mainly stay in touch by text. (We both have each others phone numbers and home address). She texts me more compare to me that rarely texts. We both include each other in our lives, caring about each others well being and being there for each other no matter what happens. I just got out of a bad toxic relationship and she also recently got out of a abusive relationship. She knows I have strong feelings for her but she isn't looking for a serious relationship at the moment, neither am I (I need to let go of the past). She said she sees me as a friend, right now. She also added "I think its best to meet up to get to know each other offline. If we both wanted to become more than friends in the future it'll be a option open." She wants I want to expect the unexpected. I want to be friends right now maybe we can be more in future but as of now I need to focus on myself and move on from my past break up.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Since you've only known each other for a year, I tend to lean toward there being no unresolved feelings. If there is anything unresolved, it is more likely it comes from her or both her and your previous relationships if they were indeed toxic. I will say this, I came out of a 30 yr marriage that was toxic. Finally got the guts to leave. What I discovered from a friend who was an retired counselor is their seeing lots of things I was doing that people in toxic relationships do, mainly to survive without going crazy. Only these coping mechanisms are not healthy for any other relationships, friends, family or more than friends. So the friend worked with me pointing out each time I was lapsing into the familiar which was no longer needed and could possibly affect any new relationships. So I got counseling and I would highly suggest that both of you get some counseling to learn to undo whatever support measures you used to get through before but are not healthy for a new relationship. Until the untreated and or unresolved issues of both your pasts are dealt with, I am not sure you can trust that things will go as well as possible with your friendship. When I was fresh out of my toxic relationship and started dating, I remember that very often the new boyfriends had to keep reminding me that they were nothing like my ex and I didn't have to explain my every thought and move and other coping mechanisms I used without knowing. This was before the treatment in counseling i got. As far as this gal friend, you both mentioned wishing to be just friends for now. So I believe that is best to stay at that level and not hope for anything more until both of you have dealt with your own pasts.
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