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Is it over, should I say anything?


Question Posted Friday December 30 2016, 11:37 pm

I'm sorry this is long. First of all my boyfriend and I did love each other very much and were very jealous of each other, we had intentions of getting married very soon.
My boyfriend and I have been broken up, got back together, broke up again and back together recently. We believed we were destined and that's why no matter what, we still wanted to keep trying. There's been no other serious issues other than constant arguing, occasional distrust, and feelings of neglect. We said we would try to work on it. I recently asked my boyfriend why he his status still says single on facebook and its public. (PS I have no facebook). I asked him to change it, and asked why he publicly wrote single in the first place. I wasn't looking for anyone and didn't want anyone even when we were broken up and always assumed he was like me, as he said. Because to me, that just looks like he's still looking.
He didn't answer why he publicly wrote single but said he would change it. In his own words "your wish is done, should I put your name instead", though this sounded sarcastic to me. He had to fly away that same day for the holidays and needed to get away because of his family issues. I saw he was posting pictures and videos from his trip but it still wrote single. This didn't seem right to me. He even knew I saw and mentioned he posted photos from his trip on facebook and that I can see them there. I said I'd rather you share the photos with me if you wanted me to see it rather then to just say go look at facebook. He laughed it off and said yeah you're right here you go and sent photos. Meanwhile, I had wrote a small bio in my Twitter saying that I was single; to give him a taste of his own medicine. I was very disappointed and heartbroken, I wanted to see what he would say if I did the same thing as him.
The next day he just freaked out and got extremely mad, he sent me a snapshot of my bio saying "how dare you write that, that means you want guys to write to you. So if we were married and you saw me talking to a woman does that mean your going to go be with a guy just to get back at me?!" I said how can you say such disrespectful things, you know I wouldn't do that but you're just trying to put the greater blame on me. Since you putting single is meaningless, so is my writing it meaningless. He stated that facebook asked so thats why he put it but twitter doesnt ask such a thing, I just said "if facebook asks for you social security number would you put that too and make it public. Do you know how heartbroken it makes me to think that you would ever get married to someone besides me, it kills me, I never thought of myself with anyone but you." He said "you should have just reminded me". I said "I already told you once, if someone respects me they will want to work on what's bothering me." Months ago I saw he also joking wrote to his cousin to find him someone to marry and was laughing about it, I sent him that snapshot and said I guess that's why you wrote single, and you're not the only one with snapshots. He said "I was joking with my cousins, you're just going to keep bringing things up you'll always be the same, you're right I'm wrong of course.
He said "have it your way you're always right I'm the (insert curse words). That's right we are different I'm glad you know. I don't need you or my family, I tried to go away and still couldn't find peace, you will never change, or try to understand me, all you can do is send snapshots from months ago and it seems you would do worst things over misunderstandings if we got married, I give up, if you want go write in the newspaper that you're single maybe you'll find someone, you have no courage to make things right." Shocked, mad, upset, I said "I said "that's what you make me assume. I only told you how I felt, but you accused me that I would go sleep with someone if I saw you talking to a woman,how could you say such a thing, there's arguing and then there's crossing the line, you made everything worst now, and if you don't want to talk anymore I'll go, I wont look at your facebook anymore either, its obvious that you see things differently than me, have a good new year and a safe trip back, if you do want to be single then 'your wish is done'". He wrote back a long paragraph but only the first few sentences came, the rest wouldn't load because it says user not available, he deleted his fake twitter profile. I texted him saying look at this snap I don't even know what you said in the ending, all you do is write cruel things and disappear as always, you accuse me of not understanding but you do the same, I never even said anything bad to you but you freaked out and curse instead of trying to solve it. I hope you find the right way in life." No response.
Hours later, I am mixed, torn, and in tears. maybe he's right I should not have wrote single as well but his approach just took things over the top which instigated me too. Both sides got carried away. Whenever he's mad, he doesn't hear or see anything, and blows off. He cuts ties and always ends things never to speak again like before; leaving me confused and heartbroken. When I tried to write something last time when we broke up he just shut me down, and wrote on facebook now I am relieved and can continue life with a clear conscience. Six months later he was the one that wrote to me saying he regrets it and missed what we had and thought it would last and plans to move near me. This time I feel he will never write again. And if I write I doubt he'll answer, would it just feed his ego and conscience again and not fix anything, what would I even say, should I even say anything? Who's right? What a happy new year it will be, it really hurts emotionally, physically and mentally. I'm done looking for or wanting anything in life. Please help me...


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