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why is he so perfect?
I'm 17 and he's 25 both from Bangladesh. Guys, this is my 2nd question pls dont get me wrong but i really need some help. So yesterday night i went to a party with him. It was his cousin's engagement party. I hav met wid some of his family members before. Yesterday he introduced me to his other family members as his "fiancee" not his gf. I was blushing the whole time. The party ended really late. He told me to stay wid him 4 d nyt. I was quite anxious bt i agreed. So i stayed with him. He knows i am not ready for sex. We were talking on his bed n i fell asleep on his hand. We both were sitting on his bed. I woke up today morning in his arms. Jst d way i was sitting last night. N he said, "morning, sunshine". Its jst d perfect thing on this whl world.
Bt now i am tensed is it evn possible for some1 to be so perfect? What if this is a drm which will come to an end?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You dont mention how long the two of you have been dating. When people meet, some tend to pretend to be someone they are not just to catch the interest of someone they want, even if they aren't the perfect match.
Or at the very least, people tend to watch their manners and act their very best, thus seeming to be 'perfect'.
The reality is....no one is perfect except whomever you consider to be the higher source, the creator, etc....
Even you and I have things about us that are not perfect.
What makes a person a good choice to be with is someone who although not perfect, is willing to compromise when needed, never intentionally tries to hurt you emotionally or physically, is willing to accept when they have messed up and apologize, who has no problem with admitting they have been wrong nor any problem with listening to and taking correction. Someone like that is a person you can deal with very easily in a relationship as long as you are the same yourself.
My first husband was none of that, doing all of it wrong which hurt the relationship and we're now divorced. My 2nd husband is ALL of those things that make him a good choice.
You may have thought it cute that he likes you enough to announce you as his fiancee, even though he never asked you or gave you a chance to accept. He is assuming that its a given fact that you will eventually marry him. Be careful about that one thing dear. My ex made sweeping decisions like that on my behalf, not giving me a chance to decide if I wanted to go out to a particular movie or restaurant. It was always, you are going with me to .....
What I didn't know at the time is that that is one of the obvious signs of a controller and having a controller for a partner is a very miserable thing...I know...I've been there.
I thought it was cute too until I was married to him and I married at age 20 and still had little life experience to know better.
I don't know this guy of yours. He may truly be a good guy and not a controller. However to introduce you in such a way to others is stepping out of bounds. If you do not have a talk with him now setting the bounds and letting him know that what he did is unexceptable to you, then you send a silent message to his subconscious mind that it was okay with you and he may attempt to controll you in many more ways in the future.
Even my wonderful husband has on few occasions done things that made me feel embarrassed in public...totally unknowingly. So I let him know how the event affected me. Because he loves me and doesnt wish to do anything that will hurt or bother me, he apologized and has never once repeated what he did. Being that you are 17, you may not be ready to take such a forward role in a relationship mostly due to lack of experience and just not knowing. Whenever you do not understand something or have a concern, have a talk with him and ask questions. Do not rush into marriage with him though as many guys will start to treat their girl differently after that as my ex husband did.
You are only 17 and hopefully in your country that means you still have plenty of time to court each other for many years, a long engagement too if need be. The time taken is important to get a chance to see if everything still is good and perfect about him or if over time, he relaxes, and lets down a pretense and fake personality and shows his true self once he thinks he has you hooked.
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You're overthinking it, I mean really its not like true love doesn't actually exist. You cant base your relationship on relationships that you have seen or heard of. You're going to get yourself in trouble by overthinking it so much because then you will be questioning it all the time and that's not healthy for your relationship. Just chill out, have fun, get to know him maybe he really does care about you and wants more from the relationship.:)
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