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How to keep a girl intrested online?
Hi, thank you for your advice. I just wanted to tell you that I wanted to ask her out but we only spoken a little bit to each other after that night of sexting one another. i did ask her out in a joking kind of way, I asked her to join me in my hot tub after work, this was the thrid day we spoke to each other. She read it but gave me no reply so I thought I rush it to soon. And then she was offline for two days. On Tuesday she came back online and we spoke for a little bit about our weekend. And the day after that I saw her online again on the dating website so I said how are you? She read it but gave me no reply. I was upset so I just logged off and ignored her because I was assuming she was using me. The next day I message her explaining to her I am not here to play around and that I am intrested in getting to know her.
Thats when she apologized and told me she been too busy to talk .
So we basically left our conversation friendly and civil.
She hasnt been online since last Saturday.
I want to continue our conversation. Get to know each other besides our sexual desires. We only talked a little bit through the week.. She continued the conversation, I thought the first night we spoke she was looking for someone to play with. However, it surpised me that she wanted to continue talking to me. So I let her in and we spoke throughout the week here and there mainly small talk. It was only ine week getting to know this girl. I even gave her my number.
As of now she hasn't been online since Saturday. So I have no idea where she is. I assume she is busy like she said she been no idea. I have no clue what happen to her.
I do want to go to the next step with her but she just disappeared again...she hasn't been on facebook either.
:/
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Well, all I can say is that there are different kinds of "Busy".
You know what a truly 'busy' day is and thankfully for most of us, we only get a few such extremely busy days where you can't remember if you ever ate anything that day or when the last time you ate was. then there's the regular kind of busy. Ones job, any evening school or workout time at the gym, running errands, and housework at home. Depending on how well organized a person is, some accomplish this with time to spare to relax a bit before bed. the others are busy until they decide to go to bed.
Now what I am getting to is, that no matter how busy a person gets, they prioritize with importance the things they need to accomplish, and those that they deem the most important to them will get the top priority to get to, no matter how busy they are.
Lets use you for an example. Lets say theres a lady who is interested in you and gave you her number saying she'd like to get to know you. She's pretty much a stranger other than you see her presence often in the schedule of your days. Not knowing how wonderful she is, you have no compunction to call her as she is'nt that important to your in the line up of tasks you have to accomplish each day so you don't make it of importance to carve out some time for her. I do know men can prioritize well and if a lady is very important to him, she'll end up one of his top 3 priorities according to tests that have been done, which I've read about. This means she is going to hear from him because he makes an effort. You would, wouldn't you? Now if just by observances, of this lady, you've already made a judgement call that you're not interested in her or getting to know her, you aren't going to put any effort into answering her messages or calls, hoping she'll get the message by the lack of your response, that you are not currently interested.
Sadly, most people do not think of being honest and at least saying something like, "the few times I've been around you, i didn't feel any chemistry so I am not interested in pursuing anything with you." Ouch, it stings...but it doesn't leave you wondering.
So it all comes down to, "does she already have a preconceived idea that she doesn't like you?"
or could i be that:
there's not enough chemistry felt whenever you've stood near her for her to WANT to get to know you better to see if there could be something between you? There's no initial "draw" like that to make her want to find time, no matter how busy she is to spend time getting to know you. tHATs what held my 2nd husband back from writing to me several times on a dating site, he worked 10 hour days every day of week, sometimes more and Saturday mornings. So he felt he wouldn't have time to give to a relationship. bUt when he wrote, what he had to say sounded just like what i was looking for so I pushed for an appt to see him to meet asap. We met during our lunch hours one day and after that, we knew we wanted to pursue each other to spend more time getting to know each other better. Now married 6 yrs. So it is very possible to take a person one doesnt know, meet and both want to get to know each other better.
If i remember correctly, she lives in same building, not someone at work? This means there's really no occasions for her to observe you and find something that catches her interest.
With women, it takes catching her interest first to have a chance of dating to get to know her. So all you can do then, is to slip like cards under her door, like the "I was thinking about you" kinds. Maybe share a poem you've written or some of your favorite quotes. Not about love or like that, just whats ring true for you, resonates with your heart. this gives her a chance to see ho your mind works, and actually does convey something about you to her. You might also take the time to think about what you would write in the "All about me" section of a dating site that doesnt include your job title, whether you have pets or not, where you've gone to school or how many countries you've traveled to. I got lots of that on dating sites. The guys shared a lot of info but by the end, I still had no clue about anything of their character and personality and thus no idea whether he and I were even remotely a possibility. Take some time to really dig deep, who are you at core? You want a full page letter that describes you to a tee. this is kinda like making a resume for a job only for a relationship. I think more people would be successful in relationships if they knew how to promote themself in the equivalent of a 'resume'. to the person of interest.
You may think you already have. bUT
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