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Does the boyfriend I've never met still love me?
My name is JeanieBeanie, and I am 14. I have been dating a boy who's three months younger than me (we'll just say his name is Joe) and I met Joe online. We found each other on the app hot or not and began dating only four months ago. Lately Joe has been acting weird. He doesn't talk to me as much, or say adorable things like he used to. Sometimes when we're face timing, I don't know if he will just hang up or if we loose connection, but either way he doesn't call back. Even when I do he sometimes won't answer. But when I iMessage him he will answer almost immediately. We are only 94 miles apart from each other, and have wanted to meet for a long time, but our parents don't know how we actually met. Sometimes I even have doubts about him dating someone where he is, considering most of his friends are girls. Does Joe not love me anymore?
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I have a daughter who met someone 2 states away at the same age. He was a yr younger. His parents had relatives in our state and planned a family vacation to include time to come by our house and meet us so the kids could meet. she got two days to hang out with him and his family, all because both of them talked to the parents who were able to work something out that summer. It doesn't mean it will happen for you but it's worth a try.
They both wrote each other a lot up until the visit and thought they were in love. After the visit, no more writing or contact. Neither of them had interest. See, it was the excitement of the anticipation of meeting someone and the wait for it that sounded better than it really was. Remember being anxious for a toy or gift you requested for Christmas and just couldn't wait. Once you had it, the interest you thought you would have it in forever kind of died away, it lost it's appeal for you.
Happens in relationships too. Thats why I advise
those wanting to get their first couple of serious dating experiences, go for someone who you can have in person, not over the internet.
Dating a girl is a new thing for boys. Girls are strange and hard to understand for lots of boys. It's hard enough in person and worse on line.
Even in person, tho lots of teens love texting, not all guys have much interest in texting. Some hate typing and prefer talking.
It helps guys greatly to talk in person, face to face with a girl so if he doesnt understand what she is saying or isnt quite sure, he can pick up clues from her body language, facial expressions and tone of voice, none of which you can get with texting or typing messages on line. For many guys, they get bored easily and the one dimensional dating on line doesnt hold their attention for long.
The love you are talking about is 'puppy love' (what my daughter had with her on line guy)
It isn't the full blown real in depth lasting love that adult's experience. NOT saying that teens can't experience this but the real lasting kind of love is something like dating, that we have to learn how to be able to do. And very few people have any clue at 14, what it really is and can be sure of their love and their partners love. At 14, I didn't know. At 20 I married and still didn't know. It was a disaster. A very unhappy, abusive marriage.
Sure it is a good thing to start learning at this age. Just don't expect the boy to have it all figured out yet or be brave enough to be honest or communicate well. Communication is a big key to having better dating experiences dear. Don't assume if a guy says he likes you or loves you that is means he is in love with you. i LOVE chocolate icecream, I am not going to marry it. See, many interpretations to the word love. Learn how to ask questions like, "So what is it about me that you love?" "If the answer is I love your humor and your laugh." it merely means that there are a couple of attributes about you he's noticed that he likes. THAT does not equal being in love with you or even wanting to date you. Guys want experience dating girls too and sometimes will say things just to keep them around long enough to learn how to talk to girls. That is first stage before romance. Learn to be the best communicator with boys and you will be way ahead of the other girls.
So ask him. But I suggest that you do not ask "Do you still love me?" this means you made an assumption that he did love you, and a guy won't like a girl assuming things that aren't there for real. Instead "Ask him why he started being your friend on line way back 4 months ago, what was it about you that he liked. Then you ask him if he still feels that way. If he says he does, you could say he doesn't talk with you as much. Has something come up in his life that takes priority over talking to you? If he says yes, then ask him how much time he thinks he reasonably will have free for you and maybe get dates and times.
As you can see, asking questions to get more clarifications on his answers will help you to know where you stand. good luck
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