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Should I move on? Forget him totally?
I am 20 years old girl.2 years ago I met a boy (23 years) on facebook. He was from the another city of my country.I never add unknown people. Actually I was searching someone from his company. And I sent friend request to him. But after chatting I came to know that he was not the one. I decided to remove him. But from his old status I came to know that he lost his mother last year. I really felt bad. And decided not to remove him. We became friends. We used to chat for long time. He shared a lot of things with me so did I. He was a nice boy. He cared for me. I forgot to take my medicine. He asked me everyday that I took my medicine or not. He asked my opinion about his business card. I mean he gave me priorities. But after 2 months don't know what happened he started to change. He didn't reply me back like before. I didn't ask why. And I started to realize that I like him. I felt bad about it that how I fall in love with someone on internet. I decided to move on and not to talk to him anymore. But that time it seemed very difficult to me. I decided to remove him. One night I knocked him and told him something about my family and then told him that I am going to remove him. He said please tell me the reason. I told him and removed him.but still I used to message him and he replied me. That time I came to know from other source that he hided things from me. He didn't told me that his father got married few days ago. He told me that he had a girlfriend for one year but he never loved her. But I came to know that after that he also had a girlfriend almost for 3 years. But he didn't tell me anything about it. After one months I added him again. He accepted friend request and talked to me like nothing happened. Everything became normal again. I gave him my number. We started to chat on whatsapp. Almost like before. It was my birthday. I asked for gift. He asked what I want. I told as your wish. He told me to ask for something. I told him that you won't be able to give me. He asked me what. I didn't want to tell him. But he forced me and requested me to tell what I want. I told him that I liked him seriously and I really wanted to spent my life with him. He told me that we didn't meet each other ever so we shouldn't think about it. One night I asked him,won't you ever love me?He said "you are a very silly girl,stop this childish,it will be good for you and relationship are really trouble thing for me". On reply I said I will wait for you because I am unable to love anyone else.He didn't say anything.One day I called him and we talked for the first time. That day he told me about his father marriage. We talked for 20 minutes. And he was nice. After that we used to talk. His birthday was coming I decided to send him a gift. I asked for his address but he refused to give it to me. But I knew his addressed already so I sent the gift. And he accepted it(There was his another female friend. She also liked him. She also send him gift but he didn't accept it.I came to know from someone.) And on his birthday he called me and said that I am crazy. But he was happy.Every thing was going well. One day I knocked him on whatsapp and after sometime he replied. Like he always does. But I felt something is wrong. Don't know why!!! But my mind telling me that something is wrong. I felt that he was not replying me. Someone else was doing it. And the person talked to me little rudely. I knew that he couldn't talk to me like that. I end the conversation. I was so upset that he allowed someone to reply me by his phone. After 7 days I knocked him and asked about the matter. He told that it wasn't he. I asked who it was. He told it was his colleague. But he didn't tell the name. I got very angry. He tried to explain me that it wasn't intentional. But I didn't pay any heed to his talk. I asked him how could he allowed someone to message me. He said that his colleague borrowed his phone for some work and I knocked that time and she replaid. She also deleted the message but told him what she wrote. And she did it for fun. I was so angry. I shouted at him. And told him not to contact me ever. At last he also got angry and told me that I was just a facebook friend to him nothing else and he never thought about me.
After that I found out the girls name. She is 1 year older than him. She also proposed him. But he said no. I contacted him again almost after 3 months. He also did. One day he called me we talked for so long. And the next day the girl tried to commit suicide and admited into hospital but he didn't even go to see her. When I heard about it I really felt bad.I come to know that the girl is back in his life.They talk to each other.But they are just friend. He never tells me anything about it ever. I found it out from another source. I also ask him that if he has any problem to talk to me he can tell me directly I won't contact him again. But he says he has no problem to talk to me.
We don't talk like before.He never knocks me. I don't knock him much. I still have that feelings for him. I still like him. But it doesn't hurt me anymore. I am doing okay in my life. I call him sometimes(like once in a month/months) . And he talk to me nicely like before we used to talk. I wonder he still remembers little things about me. I talk to him like a friend. I never talk about my feelings and all this. But last time when we talked he asked me,do I have a boyfriend now? I said,no. He asked,why? On my mind I was telling,because I told you that I will wait for you. But i didn't tell him that. I told him that you know the answer but may be you don't remember it.I was a little angry.
Should I move on?Should I cut contact with him?Forget him totally?
And yes I always feel that he has some feelings for me. May be its not love,but its special.Did/does he have?I accept the fact that he would never love me. But I still love him. And I am okay with that.
Tell me what to do now?
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If I am correct, you are the same girl who wrote quite a while back and are from Bangladesh. This same question with a few bits of different info. was posted August 22 2014, 6:07 am and 3 people answered that question. Their answers were good, you gave one a 5. So I know you read them. So hon, I am wondering why you are asking this all over again. The few bits of information that is extra this time would not change anyone's answer.
When we are young, without prior experience in dating and relationships, we don't always make the best decisions...I know I certainly knew practically nothing other than I liked the attention from this guy and married at 20. He was abusive and I stayed 30 years. I am older and know better. I would like to help prevent the same happening to other young girls by giving honest advice, but you know dear, sometimes the best lessons in life learned are by going through situations on our own and making our mistakes, as many mistakes as it takes until we learn from them.
So in answer to your Should I move on?Should I cut contact with him?Forget him totally?
Yes, yes, and yes. If you feel you need help understanding why my answers are yes, then you'll have to ask and be willing to seriously look at the answers.
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