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boyfriends dad hits him
Ok, I am not talking about beating him up or whatever. He is so strict. My boyfriend gets punished by getting the belt on his butt. Has to take off his pants and boxers and lay on his bed so his dad can hit him with the belt. My boyfriend thinks its ok for his dad to do this and even that it only happens when he deserves it. I want him to tell someone at school but he wont. Should I tell someone or how do I get my boyfriend to agree??
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Unfortunately, in the United States spanking, or hitting a child with a paddle, a belt or a switch, is not enough to constitute child abuse. In most other first world countries, this behaviour is not tolerated, but in the US parents are allowed to behave violently towards their children and call it 'discipline'.
it's wrong. It's immoral. It's bad parenting and it's not an effective way to teach children anything, at all. But it is legal.
If your boyfriend does not want to report it, and otherwise feels safe in his home, there is little that any other adult can do to stop his father. To get the law involved in a case like this, there needs to be evidence that a parent used 'unreasonable force' (which usually mean major bruises, bleeding, permanent damage or at least enough damage to require medical attention) and sometimes the child also has to express they feel fearful of the parent.
It sucks. But the best thing you can do is just be supportive of your boyfriend and how he chooses to handle this. The law can't probably can't help him unless the beatings are extremely severe. If he is ready to look for help, his best support might come from adults who can speak to his father about better ways to parent, like a pastor or priest, or another family member.
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