I don't know how to word it,I think I like this boy… not sure…
Question Posted Thursday March 20 2014, 8:48 pm
I was rehearsing this school play, and I was next to a humorous, witty boy I've been friends with for some time. We were making jokes about the play we were practicing, Alladin, and I'm only in 5th grade, so everyone has different parts in different scenes. Typically, one big part, and a bunch of company parts. We both were talking during a company number we were in,“friend like me" and we were joking about the dance moves. A kid turned around to tease, and the boy said something funny to get her to turn around. Then we looked into each other's eyes, and laughed. Not shrill, giggles, but you know-REAL laughter. And I saw something in his eyes. Now I'm wondering, now what? I've only known him for a year, but I like him someway. I don't know! I'm so clueless in love. I'm a hopeless romantic. Is that bad? And also, some boy advice?
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life? Dragonflymagic answered Thursday March 20 2014, 9:50 pm: At your age, I'd say puberty has something to do with the things you're starting to feel. The same stuff could have been happening in past years but a lack of hormones in the body in the past means you would not have noticed it or interpreted it as you do now. A shared laugh a couple years ago with someone doesn't compare to what your beginning womans intuition is telling you now. You may not know exactly what was different but you sensed something different during that one laugh, perhaps it was the moment he began to see you differently than before. It is great to have friends you can be yourself with, and share genuine laughter with. What comes first before real true love is a strong attraction to another person, a noticing of them and wanting to find out as much as we can about them. The best way I know how is to spend time hanging out together.
So if you two find it easy to communicate together, start with talking a little more at school and ask him what his favorite music or band is, does he have any favorite movies, hobbies, favorite food. People like to talk about themselves...no problem there, just don't rapid fire the questions like you're interrogating him, and give him a chance to ask you some as well. If you find that in your conversations, you are still interested in him, then ask him if he'd like to hang out with you. Ask the parents if its okay to have a guy from school come over to hang out, maybe on a Saturday afternoon to watch TV or play a board game or listen to music. There is no pressure to treat him like a date or a committed boyfriend girlfriend relationship yet. Just be relaxed and get to know him as a best friend first. This will save you lots of heartache in life if you look first for a guy you can be friends with and when the feelings get deeper and go from attraction to love, then later you hold hands and kiss and cuddle. Have respect for each others feelings and always talk things out. Anything you don't understand that he says, ask him what he meant. If he says something like I love you...don't assume it means in love with you, it means to some guys that there is something in particular about you that they really like alot, the way some people say I love chocolate, they don't have a romantic relationship with chocolate, they just love it. So for example in that case just ask him:
"So what is it about me that you love."
If you don't understand what to say or do around him tell him so. Remember, at his age, he's also just starting this process of interest in the opposite sex and not knowing anything about them. Tell him that you dont understand guys well cus you're just starting to learn and since you feel very comfortable with him and like him, you're wondering if he'd be willing to help teach you how guys think and what they mean and you'd be glad to teach him about what girls are really like. Its a great, non pressure way to get to know each other better and learn something along the way. Having him over to the house is a good way for parents to feel comfortable with their daughter having a male friend without worrying so much about how he treats her because they are right there to observe and develop a trust in him as they see him often. Save the couple dating for when you're older or the parents allow it.
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