|
how to be less emotional: I just want to be more shallow or heartless so I can have random sex and not get attached.
Ihave a really big heart I fall for guys or should I say emotionally into a guy very quickly. And I usually just get treated like crap. Or I go for the guys that treat me like carp. I like to believe in fairytales and there will be that one person one day that will completely sweep me off my feet. I refer to him as my prince charming in shining armor. But lately I've realized that's not getting me anywhere except emotionally damaged. I want to try the whole party thing and hooking up with a guy here and there. Without all the emotions and starting to like a guy for him to push me away or screw me over. I was talking to my brother and hes convinced he's never going to love again and hws basically heartless when it comes to relationships. And I realized I am shallow to the point of getting bored and temporarily liking someone then I push them away. I just want to know how can I continue being that way without getting hurt over it with my heart. I tend to be a pushover and I feel bad so I stick arouns or go out of my way. Mt question is how can I play the guy games? How can I get what I want without feeling bad for it. I've got the get what I want down mostly but I usually screw that up with my feelings. I just want to be more shallow or heartless. Please don't tell me not to give up on love or fairytales are possible. I sont want to hear that cause I tend to put my hopes way to high to reach. Just guys please tell me how to play the games without the emotions getting in the way. Thankyou in advance..
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Reality Check:
Your brother is going through a phase, he's not an expert at love and relationships. He will probably change his mind, love again, and he isn't really heartless. It's a period of time in his life that will probably pass.
If it doesn't pass, he will probably become less happy, not happier, in the long term.
This period of time in your life, will also pass.
That doesn't mean you are completely wrong. I think you have some great goals for yourself.
Learn to be less of a pushover.
Manage your expectations of others and don't push them away immediately.
Learn to have romantic and even sexual relationships that don't necessarily conform to the storybook version in your head.
Those would be very good things to learn how to do, but those aren't 'playing guy games' those are SKILLS where you learn how to be honest with yourself about what you want, honest about your expectations and what is realistic, and honest with the guys you are interested in.
You don't need to be more shallow, or heartless, you just need to be calmer and have a cooler head when approaching dating and love. You aren't going to get what you want by pretending to be heartless. You'll just end up hurting again (because if you are a good person, it will hurt you to pretend you aren't.)
Fairytale aren't possible. Unicorns aren't real. But love isn't a fairytale. Once you accept that, you'll be one huge step closer to finding it.
]
More Questions: |