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My mind is all over, i keep thinking of the hiv all the time, its been going on for a year now and seem to disbelieve all the results because im having these symptoms, im beginning tothink they are wrong, your right in saying i need counselling which im going next week to a clinic to see counsellor who deals with hiv/aids hope that they can help me. What you have said is correct and i should think 6 tests cant be wrong. Do you know what the test for hiv consists of after they take your blood , apart from elisa is there any similar tests.
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Hi. I'm afraid that I don't know the precise nature of the tests, you'd need a laboratory technician to help here. And probably a degree in biology or chemistry to understand their explanation! The symptoms seem to be the stumbling block. But HIV doesn't have a unique or specific symptom or set of symptoms. And as we discussed, many are shared with stress and anxiety. Sure, we could take a symptom and pin 'HIV' on it...easily,when that's what we're looking to pin on it. And confirm our darkest dread. I don't say medical 'self-diagnosis' sources such as websites are of no use or help. But they can certainly fuel a lot of needless anxiety and many a wrong diagnosis. The idea of looking for a 'different test' is understandable. Since the tests so far have failed to come up with the result you paradoxically, and sub-consciously 'want'....the Positive result that will confirm your belief. We like our beliefs reinforced, not knocked down. Think about this idea for a while and try hard to see what I'm saying? HIV/AIDS counselling is really more about trying to make the individual come to terms with living with this dreadful, and incurable condition. You in effect, seem to need help coming to terms with NOT being HIV+. For sure, your mind's in a 'loop' but breaking these 'neural paths' is possible. It might be a good idea to identify some possible causes for your mindset yourself. You mentioned being exposed to the virus...which (excluding 'shared needles' among intravenous drug-users, which you don't mention) inevitably means a sexual relationship with a partner who is HIV+ and was so at the time. Is there some 'guilt' here? Why are they effectively 'condemned' while you escape? You really ought to be too...is this 'fair'? The nearest analogy I can make is the feeling frontline soldiers often succumb to when comrades are killed in battle, while they live. An intense feeling of guilt. 'It should have been me...' I assume you must have had/have feelings for the other person? A 'fear of infection' is also not uncommon. From childhood, or a much later experience. A feeling that a bacteria or virus is sort of pursuing you, waiting for it's chance. Threats everywhere! Many of us have waves of hypochondria, to varying degrees, when our health is in question. These sort of ideas are really what a counsellor should be going through with you. He or she will have instant feedback from you. Until you clearly identify the cause, it is virtually impossible to start finding solutions and 'move on'. Possibly a rigorous scientific explanation of the test procedure would help, possibly not. It's quite easy to 'wish-up' a loophole. They might have mixed the samples up, you got someone elses result...six times in succession. How could that defeat ANY assurance of the reliability and accuracy of the test? I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this...the very idea has maybe crossed your mind many times? I sincerely hope you reasonably quickly find a way out of this mindset. In brief...you mentally and/or emotionally NEED these results to be wrong in order to fulfil, confirm or justify some other aspect of yourself. To make everything neatly tied-up and decided. To make things 'right'. Find out precisely why you feel that you HAVE TO BE HIV+ and you'll start to move on. Best wishes.
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