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I think I was molested when I was 3
my name is Rachel and I am going to be 24 on Thursday and I have been really depressed because my mom keeps telling me that I was molested by my father when I was only 3 years old but I don't remember it would I remember it when it happen when I was 3 when I am almost 24 now ? my dad's side of the family says she lying but of course they are going to take his side. I can't ask my dad about it because he died when I was 12. would they still have it on police records when it happed over 20 years ago and when he died almost 12 years ago? would they still have it at the pediatrician I went to ? my mom says she took me to doctor Collip but he is retired now but his son took over would they still have it in my files? Are the required by law to let me see my old doctor records from my pediatrician ? I remember bits and pieces . I remember that I rode in the police car from the head start I went to . I remember my dad being arrested right there in front of me but that's about it. I don't remember the actual event. my mom says he only spent one night in jail and only got 10 years probation. I wanted to know why he was allowed to live right behind me when their is a child predators law was the law the same in the year 1991 when it supposedly happened? I have been so depressed because this is the week mom said happened she said it happened a week before a turned 4. I have been thinking about killing myself I mean if my dad didn't love me then I am not worth anything to even be alive. I have been drinking confused about sexuality is this normal for what I am going through ? my dad was also in the Vietnam war could that have caused him to molest his 3 year old daughter with learning disabilities? please help me!
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
You have asked a very complex question which I will attempt to answer.
1. Killing yourself is the wrong thing to do. What happened when you were 3 did noting to limit your self worth or your worth to society then or now. If your father did molest you as a young child you were and are a victim and had nothing or did nothing to cause him to molest you. He was at fault because he and people like him that molest children are very sick people.
2. Stop drinking it will not solve your problem. What you need is help to resolve any issues you may have with what you are being told. I will not say your mother is wrong in bringing this up now. Though she is hurting you by doing so and because of this you now need the help of a professional therapist to resolve the issues that are now troubling you.
The therapist will help you deal with these issues and move on with your life. You cannot undo what may or may not have been done when you where 3. Now that you are more aware of what may have happened then you need to learn how to properly deal with them and the depression will lift.
3. Police and medical records are kept on file for any number of years. The police records are most likely archived. You will have to contact your local police station where you lived at the time to see how you obtain them. Court records are easier to retrieve as all you need is an approximate date of trial and the persons name for them to be retrieved. Court records are kept for quite some time after the case is resolved. Depending on how you court archives the files you may be able to view case in the courthouse going back over 100 years.
Doctors are required by law to keep patient records for a specific period of time. If your doctors son took over his fathers practice. Based on the law in your state you medical records may still be available.
I realize I gave you a lot of ifs, ands and maybes this is because the laws vary from state to state. If you truly want to review these records then you have some leg work to do to find out just how long each of these records by law must be maintained by the state. Your medical records if in the possession of the doctor are your records and you cannot be denied access to them. Police reports and trial transcripts are public records unless sealed by the courts or by law.
4. The laws that we have in place to day to protect children from predators are just about as old as you are. It wasn't that molestation was not a problem earlier than then. It was something that went unreported. As in many areas of life our school systems started to teach children for adults to touch you in your private places under certain circumstances. If an adult does touch you then you tell your parent, a teacher or a police officer.
This approach to teach this to children in school brought to light just how big a problem this was. Once legislatures saw the problem for was they passed a whole batch of new law to try and protect young children.
5. My advice to you is you seek the help of a professional therapist now that this has been brought to the front of your mind. This event and your learning disability may or may not be related it depends on your disability I would think. A therapist is better suited to answer that question.
6. Call this number; 1-800-656-HOPE. It is a hot line for victims of abuse and incest. They can help you find the proper therapist to help you in your home town.
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