It's a bit long but I'd really appreciate the advice.
There's a guy that I am/was interested in but I dont think he likes me. I'm overthinking it, most likely because I've never really met him one on one before. But I just find it odd that I saw him first with my friend (who's about 15), I'm around the guy's age and he's 21. I made her add him on facebook because she was there when I saw him and I didn't wanna randomly add him out of the blue. And I figured, she's 15, how would that be awkward in my case. But yeah, he adds us both and ends us messaging her and has been since. Shes not into him or anything and he has a girlfriend (even though I found out the other day he told her he wishes she were older and how he thinks he should stop talking to her because she's a lot younger than he is). I find it odd and weird but I wouldn't tell her to stop talking to him because I thought I would use it as an opportunity to get to know him. Now, a while back, when he was single, he used to "poke" me on facebook, and we all know that's a way for people to acknowledge others without actually having to talk to them to see if they "approve" (or at least that's how i see it). So I poked back and it happened for a bit but then stopped. Then about a month later, I saw him again, and my little friend was there with me. They didn't talk to each other face to face because that was the first time they saw each other that they were aware of. But then, later that day, he messaged her on fb and they kept talking. (She knew I was into him but I didnt think she would have ignored him for no good reason). So i was of course, jealous and upset. But I didn't lash out or anything. I just told myself, it was not meant to be and he was a creep.
The other day, the idea came to me that I should use their friendship to my advantage. He deactivated his facebook for the longest while (its been a few months now since that incident). And I noticed, last week, he reactivated it for about a day or so. So while I was talking to my friend, I told her "I love how he reactivated his facebook for one day and deactivated it again" ... and she told me that he messaged her in that time. I wasn't too surprised but I also wasn't expecting that. He apparently asked for her number, and she gave it to him... (its an ipod app free texting number) And that's when she told me about him wishing she were older and maybe he should stop talking to her. She told me she said that she doesn't care if he decides to stop because the age difference doesn't bother her (im assuming this means, she knows where she stands on how she feels about him). Anyway, so i told her to text him randomly and somehow bring me up.
And we devised a little plan on working me into a convo.. and he told her that he doesn't know me. she mentioned that he should get to, that i was cool to talk to and whatever. but she also had to go at the same time, so she also sent that with a goodnight. Oh, she was also sick and she told him . So after she sent the text about getting to know me and then saying goodnight, she told me that he just told her goonight and i hope you feel better. (i dont have the exact texts..nor do i want to ask for them),
Anyway, I;ve never really seen the guy in person and its true he doesn't know me. I;m sure he would like me, if he ever did get to know me, even as a friend. but I never see him. But i was hoping that he would talk to me every once in a while the way he does with her. I mean, she didn't do anything but get his attention just like that. I should also mention that shes a nice looking girl for her age, at least in her pictures that she takes, she looks older and whatnot.
So yeah, should I completely drop him? I think he has a gf right now but it's weird that he's telling my friends the things that he's telling her. But, i dont mind just being friends with the guy, at least for know, and hopefully they break up. But now that im kinda seeing how he is from an outisde view, he could be bad news. Or, maybe I don't know the story and there's something up with him and his girl. I dont know. I try to look for the best scenario sometimes, even though its rarely ever the case.
But even the fact that I don;t know him, he doesn't know me,,, I don't know, should I feel sad that he completely ignored her telling him about me.
I feel kinda pathetic because shes 15 and I'm not getting any younger lol.
What do you think?
There is nothing that could be going on with his girlfriend that makes flirting and leading on a 15 year old when you are 21 okay. It doesn't matter if his girlfriend is a crazy bitch. He could dump her, not cheat on her. There is no reason he still shouldn't be flirting behind her back, especially not with someone so much younger than him.
He's a creep. It's quite possible he is chasing a girl so much younger than him because he can get away with being a creep, where an older woman is more likely to see through it.
Don't be jealous of your friend. Let her know you've moved on and give her someone to talk to when this goes bad with him and her, because that is path it's on right now. [ Razhie's advice column | Ask Razhie A Question ]
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