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messy situation, but I dont wanna give up?
I was with this guy for 2 years and during the first 8 months, this guy I use to work with came into my life and made me have mixed emotions. I was torn between both of them, but I decided to stay with my boyfriend because I was scared to take a risk.
Well the last 8 months of my relationship, I was trying hard to find the other guy because I realized I made a mistake and I felt terrible about it. Well about a month ago I finally came into contact with him && I realized that I love him. I knew I did from the beginning, but I was so afraid of making the wrong decision that I just went with what I thought was right. This guy is beyond amazing. My previous relationship was very unhealthy in many ways, and he was there for me as a friend, and was very open and nice. He told me a few weeks ago that he still felt the same about me, but the problem is, he has a girlfriend of a year and a half. The roles are reversed. I guess its my karma? He found out a week ago that his girlfriend was 4 months pregnant. He of course wants to stay with her and help raise the child and doesn't want a broken family. Which I respect completely. He says everything is in God's hands. If we are meant to be together, it'll happen, if him and his girlfriend aren't meant to be together- than it will happen.
Well last night, we all went out downtown and had a blast. We got a hotel room and we cuddled, kissed, and enjoyed each others company. He told me he knew he was doing wrong but it felt right and he would have never done that with any other girl.
I know I'm wrong for my part in this, but I made the mistake in letting him go the first time, and I'm not sure if I should accept him as a friend only, or let him decide what happens within us.
EVERYONE- I mean, his friends, my friends, our families, ect keep saying that we will be together. They all see something that we haven't yet seen && they keep saying we are meant for each other and we would be great together.
I am willing to help take care of his child like it is my own. I know there is more at stake than just me and him; but idk what to do..?
What would you do?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Back off. For your own good.
This guy just found out his long-term girlfriend is pregnant, then he took you out for a romantic night in a hotel room.
That's seriously shady business.
That's him doing something deeply deceptive and hurtful to the family he said he didn't want broken up. That is someone who does not have their head on straight.
Worse than that, it's him using you: His life just got really scary, and having an affair with you was an easy escape from his problems.
That's not an 'Opps! I kissed someone while drunk!" What he did was a calculated, thought-out and expensive deception.
This has "Going to end badly" written all over it. This is a guy who is willing to behave, really, really badly in order to get what he wants.
If this what happens when you 'let him decide what happens' then I'm not so sure it was a mistake to let this guy go the first time. He might be a good person in the end, but what you've described is a guy who is currently displaying horrible judgement.
Back off. Keep yourself safe from this guy's crazy.
Stay friends if you'd like, but take romance and sex off the table. If all he wants is a girl to fool around with in order to escape the stress of his life - he'll find someone else. If he isn't happy with his girlfriend - he'll break up with her. But if you keep supplying the girl on the side for him, he'll never need to face the reality of his situation, and you'll end up as the other woman until your affair also, eventually, becomes a source of stress for him.
At that point, you'll find that what he with you, he'll do to you.
If he is a good, stay the fuck away until he starts acting like one again.
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