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i cant stop cutting :( please help
ok so i did what ya'll said and told my bf.
when i told him he went all out saying how cutting ruined his life and now he has scars. of couse i already knew that he used to cut.
but the catch is he figured it out from this site. i dont know how but he read it and called me up and went on and on.
now its been about 2 weeks and he has not called me.
im scared to call him cause he might go onand on again. he might even yell at me cause he came close to it and he tolk a deep breath and spoke in a whisper.
is he mad at me for not telling him or is he calming down from our "fight"?
should i call him or wait?
any advise will be very thankful!!
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
I'm an adult who is probably old enough to be your grandfather. I am more concerned with your cutting than your relationship with your boyfriend. Cutting is very dangerous. Cut to deep or in the wrong spot an you can bleed out and die before help arrives.
Lets first tackle the cutting by allowing me to offer you a substitute for it. I believe what i am about to suggest will be just as good and is safer. Find the biggest fattest ruberband you can find and let it hang loosely from your wrist. When you feel the need to cut, snap the rubberband against your wrist instead. You cut for you want to feel something. Snapping the rubberband will give you the same feeling of pain the cutting does. Plus you do not have to go off and hide to do it, you can snap the rubberband anywhere.
The fact that you cut tells me you are having a problem that is more than you can handle.Whatever it is cutting will not resolve the problem. You may need professional help with say a talk therapist. Someone you can confide in and trust to tell what the problem is, who will help you resolve the problem in total confidentiality. The talk therpist is your confidant. Whatever you say to him or her stays with him or her. The therapist may say to your parents something to the effect of what they need to do to help you but not what you said to them. An example would be if your parents were overly protective. A therapist might say something to the effect that their daughter needs their trust and needs to grow and experience the world around he. Maybe not in those words but they would make the point known that you desire more freedom. The therapist find out what your parents problem is in giving you more freedom.
You start this process by telling you parents you are cutting. Then asking them to take you to your doctor who will know who to send you to and how to help you.
Once you are being helped and the stress of the problem that is causing you to cut is off your shoulders. Then you can work on your relationship with your BF.
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I guess the best thing to do is put yourself in his shoes. Someone he cares for a lot told him a while ago that his loved one is hurting them self. It's not something that people can easily accept. Perhaps he's feeling inadequate. Feels as though his part in your life may hold no real meaning. Perhaps right now, he's trying to figure things out. Trying to figure out where he stands. Or he could just be calming down. It's never easy to accept that your loved one is hurting them self. It's honestly quite an emotionally painful thing. If you really would like to stop cutting, then do it. Just stop. If you feel the urge to do so again, relax, and don't forget to breath. Remember, you may feel that your life is awful, but think of all that you have that others are not as lucky to have. I've survived my cutting experience, so can you. It's best to stop now, before things take a turn for the worse. You wouldn't want to end up the way I did. Three 4 inch deep slits to both wrists... Life is short enough. Enjoy it while you can. You will eventually, in time, regret the damage you are doing to your body. I know I do. I hate the reminders, and if I could, I would take it back. I would never have done it. The scars remind me of my weakness and that even if I had it bad, there are still others out there that have it MUCH worse than I do.
As for your boyfriend, perhaps send him a text, (that is if you have a cell phone.. I don't ;p lol) If not, then send him an email. Perhaps he's really just hurting because someone he cares a lot for is hurting. I mean, really think about it. Hypothetical. Your boyfriend is secretly cutting, because he's apparently been emotionally hurting (in this synopsis, he's with you). Instead of coming to you and talking to you about what it is, what is hurting you, (not the razor of course) you end up just hurting yourself, instead of talking to someone you "love and trust". I honestly believe he may be taking it hard. There we go, instead of hurting yourself, talk to your boyfriend about what it is that's upsetting you. No matter what it is. I know this is a long winded explanation, advice.. whatever you wish to call it, but hopefully it'll help you. If not a lot, then hopefully even a little. Get a hold of your boyfriend, and tell him what it is that's bugging you instead of going it alone and harming yourself. Hell, even call him. Just leave the sharps alone.
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