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gaining trust with my ex boyfriend how can i?
I am 39/f he is 38/m...Ok!me and my ex had been friends for 13yrs before he asked to take it farther.Hed always been the the love of my life,so of course I said yes.Lasted a whole 2months,because all my past relationships including a 12yr marriage were physically and mentally abusive.I guess what happened was I started getting needy and clingy and very insecure,without realizing what i was doing,i let my past mental abuse dictate my feelings.He never gave me any reason not to trust him,but little by little he started withdrawing and getting distant.Scared the heck out of me.The more he backed away the harder i tried.One night while he was in the shower I looked in his phone,which at the time I knew wasnt right but it was like i kept thinking about past experiences and I did it.
also it seemed like I was always wanting to make sure he still cared and wanted to be with me. so one night i asked do you wanna be with me,he finally had enough,he made me leave,hes never gotten that mad at me or ever raised his voice.he txtd me and he was done.that was in january 2012.I did everything to get him back for 3wks and he ignored me,except once.He pretty much told me what it was,and I acted to much like his exwife.So i lost his trust,I know we were meant for each other,as many times as we lost touch and found each other.I need help to find out how to gain this back,if hes not wanting to talk or see me.Ive made alot of changes,and I want him to see this.I know he loves me,how can i get another chance.
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Well first of all you have to realise, they're not all the same its hard I know but there are some good ones and he could be one of them. Also going on his phone was wrong anyway because even if he had nothing to hide he would still feel as if you didn't trust him. You need to realise he's not like the rest and he needs to realise you've been hurt before and you need looking after. Hope I helped x
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