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My partner doesn't want children yet
Hi there. My partner has just told me he doesn't want children any time soon. The thing is, I hae a daughter who we raise together. We've been together 3 years and my daughter is 3 and a half, her biological dad sadly died in a road accident before she was born so he is the only dad she knows. He says he's not really but this doesnt make sense as he is already raising my daughter? Plus he still insists he doesnt love me yet. He's a nice guy, he takes care of me and my daughter but I'm getting sick of this 'i don't love you yet' stuff. He is upsetting me, should he love me by now? Does he know? Its silly, is he using me? We live together, he works occassionally but I support him financially. Basically, what if he never loves me? Half of me wants to give him all the time he needs, we are in no rush and I really want to be with him, but the other half is angry and wondering if I should stick up for myself more. It would be nice for my daughter to have abrother/sister whilst she is still young, this is also better for me as I want to go back to work in the future and having a child later on would make it harder. I do love him, I tell him often, and I don't want to push. I know he cares for me, I just feel used sometimes. I dont know if I have a right to feel this way though or if i should give him more time and respect his feelings...
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
3 years is a long time to be with someone for them to still not be sure of whether they love the person or not. This guy sounds like he is confused on the relationship, If it were me I'd give him an ultimatum either he sorts out how he feels or you hit the gas and leave him off the bandwagon. I would generally say give him some time but 3 years is just long enough to keep someone hanging.
I would also advise you both to take time apart, but considering this guy works and that is your time apart I'm probably going to tell you that maybe it's time to leave the relationship. You have the responsibility of raising your daughter and you don't need the baggage of constantly wondering if you are with someone who loves you or not. This guy sounds like he is sticking around for your daughter but at the same time he states he isn't her father. If he is in her life and helping you raise that child then he IS her father whether it's blood or not. I'll give you my opinion rather then advise: I'd leave and find someone that knows what they want.
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