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Have you ever felt like you wanted to die? 13yo
Have you ever felt suicidal? How'd you get over it? What made you feel that way?
*I'm not looking for advice, I just want to know if anyone has ever felt that way, just curious. So please, no trying to talk me out of anything, or telling me how suicide brings people to hell because I'm not killing myself and if I wanted to I would be dead by now.
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I used to feel that way but i overcame that because i knew that i just needed to find the real meaning of life and my purpose in life. life can be really difficult at times and when it knocked me down i knew i just had to get back up again, and i stayed strong, kept my head up and kept smiling, and thats how i got through it oh and my friends helped me through it alot too. hope this helped!
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Yes, I've felt that way a lot and for years. I had a depressive illness and was in psychiatric care for two years. I was your age when I first was admitted and i was literally trying to kill myself every hour of every day.
There is such a huge difference between feeling suicidal and going the step further and actually resolving to die.
I went through a lot of therapy - 3/4 of which was useless - but I learned to fight. I struggled through everyday and took each time as it came. We all re learned everything from social behaviour and relationships, to how to deal with out feelings and thoughts.
I personally took up exercise which was a godsend; i attended a great hospital school where i learned i was intelligent and developed a passion for all things academic; I set myself difficult goals every day and tried to achieve them... I basically fought for a life. I put myself out there, got involved in everything i could think of and aimed to do it all with everything i had in me.
In tandem with the therapy I had received, I fought through every day for years. I startted to want things like a career, the experience of university, see the wonders of this world, to simply go outdoors with my dog and lie in the grass. In these past few years I have realised I want to live.
I have officially stopped having to fight through every day. I embrace it. And yes, I did fail several times. But I'm a determined wee shite! I still cannot remember the feeling of happiness though there have been recent times where I've felt very short flickers of an amazing emotion and I was first startled by it, i didnt know what it was. But im convinced what I felt was happiness. They're becoming regular now and I'm excited.
It took so much work but after my psychiatric work was done i was ready to fight on my own and by experiencing life, i slowly and surely began to want it. I've applied to college which I start this august, I want to go to university thereafter and have a career in publishing. There is so much I want in life and I have a smile on my face.
I was a victim of abuse and now I'm a victim of no one. If you ever want to talk about such things, curiosity or otherwise, feel free to drop me a line!
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