I feel like im lost. Like this whole world is moving around me the more it moves the more i sheild myself. I act like i dont care and nothing bothers me but some stuff does im 16 /f i feel alone im losing my bestfriendd and i dont feel comfortable with anyone. I feel ugly even though i know im pretty. I feel like no one wants me and like im meannt to be a lonely soul in this world. I dont understand. I feel like i dont belong and ive felt like that forever. Like i dont belong with anyone anywhere. I dont understand. I want to find myself
xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx answered Tuesday June 7 2011, 6:13 am: What your feeling is what a lot of teenagers feel. I know I went through feelings like this when I was in High School. It's really horrible and sometimes a little bit scary. The best thing to do when you feel like this is to talk to people, and you've made a fantastic first step by asking people here. Try and talk to your parents, a family member or someone you trust about it. If you don't want to talk to your family, go to your school councillor. You are always more than welcome to make a time to see your school councillor, and I think that that is an easier way to talk about how your feeling than talking about it with people you know. I know it's scary talking to people about it, but it'll feel nice venting how you feel.
You're not alone. You have family that love you and will always be there for you. I know it's lonely not having a lot of friends, and I know what it's like to lose a best friend, but things will be okay. You're so young, and losing friends is a part of life. You can always try to fix the friendship with your friend; try talking to her about it and figuring how to work things out. If things don't work, you'll make more friends.
When you feel ugly, look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself you're beautiful. Even if you don't believe it. Never call yourself ugly or anything negative. Whenever you have a negative thought about yourself, remind yourself how beautiful and amazing you are. Sometimes it can be really hard to say "I'm an amazing girl, I'm smart, I'm beautiful" but the more times you say it, the easier it gets. Never stop telling yourself how beautiful you are. You are absolutely 100% stunning.
I don't want you to get worried, but the reason I brought up speaking to people was because if you leave this it can turn into clinical depression. Don't be scared of depression. If you are a depressed, you can absolutely be happy again. It takes a lot of time and effort, I know because I suffered for a very long time with it, but I was able to be happy again so I know that anyone can. Talking about it with the school councillor will make it easier for you to figure out ways to move on from the way you're feeling.
Please know that you're not alone at all in feeling this way. Other kids at your school, in your grade are most likely feeling this same way, but they just don't show it.
You're only 16. No one knows what they want to be or where they want to go when they're 16. I had no idea what I wanted to be or who I was when I was 16. I'm 19 now, and I'm starting to get just a little bit of an idea of who I am. In time you'll start to understand yourself more. When you finish High School you'll grow a lot as a person and you will learn a lot more about yourself. It seems so far away, but it's really not far at all.
You will always belong somewhere. Maybe where you live, in your town, maybe that's not where you're meant to live forever. When you finish school or college, you should travel and explore the world. Even now you can just think of some places you'd really like to see and different things you'd like to see or experience at these places. I've never felt like I belonged in the city I live in, but I now know that I'm meant to move somewhere else in time. And remember, even when your family fights or has problems, you will ALWAYS belong with them. They love you more than they could ever show. You are a really wonderful, special person and you'll meet people that you can connect with in time. It took me a long time to find people that I was able to feel comfortable and myself around. Even now I only have about 3 people in my life that I feel like I really connect with, but it took me a long time to find them.
What made me start to smile again was finding things that interested me. I didn't realise how much I loved writing until I was 17. When I realised, I started writing every day. I love painting, drawing, playing guitar and reading too, so when I'm feeling sad I start painting or playing a song or reading a book. I'm not really good at any of these things honestly, but they make me happy to practice them. These little hobbies make a part of who I am. I may be a terrible painter, but I love painting and that still makes painting a part of my identity.
Try and find things that interest you. It could be a hobby, a sport, or even just learning about something you like. If you like ancient Egypt or another country, start learning about it. If you like going for walks, then start spending a little bit of time every day walking. I know that when you say you want to find me you mean more than an identity, you mean you as a person. But finding things I liked and was interested in made me feel like I was a person again, and it made me happy.
Try and talk to someone, if no one will talk to you then go to the school councillor. Tell yourself you're beautiful and wonderful every day, because sweetie you really are! Start trying new things and find out what interests you - doing something little that makes you happy can make you feel better about yourself. Remember that you are young and that things WILL change. There is always light at the end of a tunnel, and there is always belonging and happiness that you will find in time. [ xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx's advice column | Ask xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx A Question ]
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