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Falling In Love with a guy who is already taken.
There is this guy "Z"... We have been friends since the begining of school and hes a really sweet guy. He has had a gf for almost 2 years now. So i never even looked at him that way. well they broke up about a month ago and he started talking to me more and more. I fell for him so fast. He can be a "flirt" with alot of girls and im well aware of a few girls that he "like(d)(s)"... We started hanging out every weekend, going to church togeather, youth group, ect. we were togeather most days. He kissed me (my first kiss) and i was so happy, and yet so sad because he wasnt my boyfried. well this went on for like 2 more weeks. Now he's back with his ex Girlfriend......... We still hang out every weekend, and still flirt, and this weekend he kept 'snuggling' with me. I dont understand what he wantss. Ive talked to him about it before he says hes never alowed to see his gf, so my thought is well whats the point then?! he says he doesnt know. We talk all the time, flirt, snggle, talk on the phone for hours and hours. It is the one thing in my life that makes me really happy. and yet every time we hang up, or he leaves, i feel so sad. i feel like im a bad person because he has a gf, i feel like im setting myself up to be hurt but i cant stop my self...... I dont really have a question. but i need some advise. I hate feeling like im being stupid, but getting over him doesnt seem like an option.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
One very very important rule to remember is: Never make someone your priority when they only make you their option.
Yes, you may really like this guy, but it seems like he isn't sure of what he wants. If you want to be his girlfriend, main squeeze, etc., you need to stop being the bread plate to the left. In order to do that, you need to figure out what he wants.
Don't let him snuggle with you if he's taken. Give yourself some value, per say. If he sees that you're not giving in to him because you guys aren't officially together, he'll want to make it happen :) You're right about setting yourself up to get hurt. You could be doing that, so you need to take some control of the situation. If he wants to keep you as a friend, the snuggling and cuddling and stuff needs to diminish immediately. On the other hand, if he realizes he wants to be with you, then he must decide to leave the other one and get with you. Bottom line, NEVER be an option.
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Your worth so much more then to come 2nd to some guy. You should tell him that you really like him but you don't want to be 2nd choice anymore. That he needs to choose. And if he can't then that's still choosing because after that you should leave him alone for awhile. Maybe hell come to his senses maybe not. If not then get on w your life your still young and have a lot to experience.
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