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im in love with her but she haes me
she really hates me (and yes she did tell me she does). it started on wednesday when she got my bus with me. i treid talking to her cos i didnt know she was anoyd with me but she didnt really talk back and she didnt sit by me on the bus like she normally does.then on thursday lunchtime she came up to me and asked if she could speak to me in privet.so we did. and she asked if i knew anything about the pen so i assumed she was talking about our teachers pen which everyone thought id stolen(i hadnt) and cos im a bit stupid i didnt think to ask her what she was talking about and just said no. so then she asked me if i considered her a friend and i said yes ofcourse. then she said i oviously didnt consider her a friend cos id lied to her about the first question so i must have lied to her about the second one. and then she walked of. and refused to talk to me for the rest of the day. then on friday ( the last day of tearm and the last day as a form cos we were being split up next year) it was a half day and she barly spoke to me. she said about one thing to me all which was i was a terrible friend cos i always lie to her and never say sorry or thanks and basicly im a complet bitch. and that was when i cried so hard i threw up. not very nice. and i said sorry to her a million times that day and told her i loved her (cos i do really love her so much it hurts somtimes) but she just said i was lieing again cos i oviously dont. so thats the main story but in the summer hols i had a sleepover with her and my 3 other best friends and she kept making 'jokes' about how i was a lesbian cos i have a tendency to hug people alot. and shes blocked me on fb and wont repli on formspring and i think shes blocked my phone number as well. so i cant even talk to her. i think shes been anoyed with me for a while cos i used to get bullied on fs. they said i was a lesbian and described in very graphic detail what me and her(the one who hates me)(shes called beth) do together. and also she stop letting me hug a while ago, whenever i treid she pushed me of her. the thing is, she lets everyone else hug her. and one last thing, i was gonna commit suicide today but i cant cos i think shell feel guilty if i died.oh sorry one more thing, she read my diary so she does know how much i love her. please help and sorry this is very long,if you stuck around to read it all, thanks and if you answerd this, i love you xxx
(btw im 13 so is she and im a girl)
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Wow first off dont commit suicide,not because of her but because you are important weather they say so or not.This girl sounds like a big snob.You should block them on fb and dont talk to them.If they were your real friends they would accept you weather your gay or not thats your choice its your life not theres.Its not like you were forcing yourself of them in any way.And if you love you like you say shes not worth your love,I know it hurts loving someone who dosnt feel the same,but in time you will feel better im not saying you will not love her any more where human we just cant help but love.But i my opinion you should let her go and ignore those so called friends.Find new ones there are girls or even boys out there who would love to have a friend as caring as you.You should never feel like your not worth someones time,you are a great bright young girl and you desirve to feel loved and accepted.I care about you and I bairly know you.Please just remember to be yourself,and forget those lozers there nothing special.Your young you will meet plenty of people and have more loves and they will always be better than the last.Life is full of possiblitys you just have to open your eyes to see them.If you ever need any thing you can ask me any time Im always here to help a friend when in need.I love you to please remember there still are people who care about you weather your straight or gay.It is your life I wont ever juge you.
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well first off i understand how you feel. this girl sounds like she isn't your friend, the way she treats you. ignore her at school, make new friends. as for the lesbian part, your still young so you have a lot of time to figure out who you are. and that girl has no business reading your diary. and if i were you don't talk to her on facebook, or reply to what her or other people say on form spring. i mean it's really none of their business if your gay or not. if she and those other girls continue to bully you at school tell a teacher, parent, or trusted adult. because wha their doing isn't right.
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