You just gave me advice about my boyfriend of a year..(thanks by the way!) and i was just wondering..I have tried to bring up these things. But my boyfriend hates talking about anything like that. He immediately shuts down, and suddenly the answer to every single question is "I don't know". He absolutely hates "talking" and will do anything to change the subject or get out of it. I've tried everything, and I don't know the right way to approach any serious topics without him shutting down like this. advice?
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life? alexismeverett answered Saturday October 23 2010, 8:43 pm: Your welcome! The best way to approach something like this is to stay away from blaming him or making him feel attacked. Try not to say "You're making me feel like.." ect. Instead say, "Lately I've been feeling like..." Make sure you don't freak him out by acting too serious, you can even make a joke about it to lighten things a little. For instance, you could joke that you're becoming one of those annoying needy girlfriends that constantly needs reassurance. Then sort of ease your way into the conversation by saying, "But honestly, I've felt a little distant lately, and I was wondering if you feel the same way." He probably shuts down because hearing that you need to talk is too much for him and makes him nervous. Instead of making it a big deal, smoothly mention it when you guys are hanging out and things are going well. Feel free to ask if there's anything else you need. Good luck! [ alexismeverett's advice column | Ask alexismeverett A Question ]
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