|
Insecurity
17/f: I've been with my boyfriend for 9 months, but lately I've begun to feel insecure about our relationship. I think it's because this summer, he has met a lot of new people at his workplace, while at mine, there's no one around my age whom I can really talk to. He told me how he hated being around people who are lazy and irresponsible, but now he's friends with a lot of them. I'm glad that he's comfortable with them, but I'm starting to feel like I want to be with him more than he wants to be with me. I don't know if I'm thinking too much, but it seems like before, both of us made an effort to remain close despite our busy schedules, and lately it feels like I'm the one trying more. Also, I'm not a jealous person by nature, but I feel kind of threatened because he has told me about a girl at his workplace who seems to be interested in him. I trust him, but I know there are girls who don't care that a guy is taken. Her friends also work there and they might try to push them together because obviously I'm not there to do anything about it. He said that he told me because he wants everything to be open between us, not because he was interested in her or anything. Sorry that was long, but bottom line is I feel insecure and I'm just wondering if my insecurity is reasonable or if I'm worrying too much. Thanks!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I would call it slight insecurity - but no girl can help that. All of us girls have had a heartbroken or been hurt in the past - of course we are going to doubt our relationships or our partners at some point.
I would say you are also worrying a bit too - He is your boyfriend and you guys have been together for a while, you need to be able to trust him. There is no reason to doubt him because he has never hurt you. In a lot of relationships some girls can get parnoid and drive their boyfriends insane with their incessant jealousy. DON'T get like that, please! You'll give him a reason to go out and hurt you , because you hurt him by not trusting him.
I can understand your doubts, but he's just made a few friends, it's summer and he is most defintly entitled to enjoy himself. Focus on your career and your relationship, not his actions and his friendships.
It only feels like he hasnt put in the effort to see you because you feel like the outsider - You don't get to share him all to yourself, and you don't have a good working enviroment like he does.
If you are concerned, you should confront him - tell him how you feel like you havn't spent a lot of time together, he should understand since you guys are in a relationship!
Just let it go, he's made new friends, and you will too. You have no reason to get insecure - he's with you for a reason - because he has FEELINGS for you, not this other girl. You should trust him ebcause he seems very honest - he didn't HAVE to tell you about this other girl did he?
Just remember he is with you because he likes you. Simple. Tell him you want to spend time with him since you havnt seen him as often as you would liked. TRUST him, he trusts you. Meet him from work so you guys have more time together.
Get a friends opinion, they'll know you both enough to give you more usable advice than I can give you.
Hope I helped,
Sage :0)
]
More Questions: |