Yeah, so usually I'm good at confronting my friends about this, but this time, it's kind of hard, considering that it's my bestfriend since the first grade.
Well, she's been dating this guy for 6 and half months, but he's been nothing but a jerk ever since they've been dating for about one or two months. To her, he may be really sweet, and I'm happy for her, but for some reason, whenever she's with her friends, he turns all bipolar. He'll accuse her of cheating on him and calling her ugly names when she's done absolutely nothing. One time, after he called her a slut, I told her mom and then leaves a voicemail on her phone saying it's over between them, and that he can thank me for it, which left her in tears for the whole night.
He's 17 and can drive and she's 15, almost getting her learner's. So, he basically shows up wherever she is, and the only real friend that he has is her 16 year old brother.
I've confronted her before about it, but it almost turns into an argument, which we both don't want.
Please, help?
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship? hear2listen answered Saturday June 20 2009, 7:40 pm: ok so i really JUST went through the same exact thing.. almost. you see when i read this i was starting to think our mutual bff wrote it because what happened to us is similar to what is happening to you. I tried to helpand mae things better becaus my friend was being hurt emotionlly and i wanted her to stop, but when i did try to help it only made thngs worse! What i figured out is that she needs to make her own decisions. Sometimes its best to let her work it out herself, though it may be hard. She needs to realize this guy is wrong for her on her own terms. everyone fighting her will make her want him even more. [ hear2listen's advice column | Ask hear2listen A Question ]
thequotablepatella answered Saturday June 20 2009, 5:13 am: It seems that one of the hardest lessons that teenagers have to learn when they're growing up is to fight the temptation to get involved in the relationships of their peers. There are certainly a lot of couples out there who get along incredibly well, but there are a considerably greater number who don't appear to be right for each other. It just takes time for them to come to the realization that they aren't right for each other. Getting involved in the situation won't help anybody, no matter how ridiculous it may seem.
You'll find yourself in this same situation repeatedly over the course of your life, and the best thing that you can do is stay out of it. If their relationship works in the way that you've described, then it will end soon enough. You just have to make sure that you don't confront your friend about it and lose her because of some jerk. [ thequotablepatella's advice column | Ask thequotablepatella A Question ]
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