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Thank you =]
Hey thanks so much your advice really helped and it nice to know that theres someone who gets it and that I can relate to.
I was strongly thinking about giving him a chance
and thinking what you said was true,
until i
got a text from him about two nights ago he was drunk, okay so heres how it went..
(btw the weekend i didnt get with him a girl called claire and this guy shane had sex)
in one of the texts he said to me that night he said so you be claire and i be shane..
and i said meaning?..if your incinuating what i think you are you know im not like claire..
and he said yea ino but we'l just do what they did (have sex.) and this really shocked me because I honestly didnt think he was like that.
I replied and said ehh I dont think so..and he said ah we will love itl be our birthdays and all (our birthdays are really close and we would be celebrating them together,we were talking about ithen it led on to this)
I said birthday or no birthday its still not happening he said why not and I said have I not made myself clear?im not easy like that and I thought u knew that.
he said but maybe a once off? and your friend can get with mine.
i said then so thats all im good for?not a hope in hell drop it.
then i get a text the next morning saying sorry,and that he was really drunk last night.
so here I am now totally confused again after that everyone has said its all hes after so stay away..but ive been trying to make excuses and convince myself it was just the drink talking you know?
and that he really is a decent guy,because ive known him about a year and half and when i first met him everyone thought he was lovely but i had stopped talking to him for a few months and during that time he changed,well he grew up for one and it was like he was cocky in a way..anyway
my really good friend dave said he thinks hes just messing me about and that so ive asked him to find out his actual feelings towards me and what hes looking for..if its just sex he wants or does he actually respect me..but hes not going to say I asked,then hes going to warn him not to mess me about because he said he doesnt want to see me get hurt and that I should just try to keep distance for now,but im sure you understand how hard it is not to text back when you see their name just pop up,but im gonna take your advice though and distract myself and try to focus and think about other things.
I just thought id let you know what was happening and to thank you =]
sorry this is long any more advice or opinions on this whole thing please let me know! if you dont mind.
<3
Jess. =]
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Yeah, that definitely gives me a few more thoughts and opinions if it's cool.
Well, I would agree with your friend, Dave. You should definitely keep your distance for now and keep your guard way up. Blaming things on alcohol is way too easy. Plus, you know what they say, alcohol breeds honesty. Usually when people are drunk, they're saying what comes to their mind and not thinking of the consequences.
That could mean one of two things:
He either thinks that all the time. Which hearing this new information makes me think is a definite possibility. If it was just the alcohol talking, how would he already have the idea of your friend having sex with his friend, too? It seems to me that he and his friend have discussed this before and decided that they want to hook up with you and your friend.
The other possibility is that it really was just the alcohol speaking. Maybe his mind was just really clouded at the time and he wasn't thinking straight. But I definitely wouldn't put my money on it. You need to have your defenses way up.
It is really hard not to text back when you see their name on your phone. Your heart just skips a beat and you have to know what they're saying. You want to text back and see what they want or what they have to say. But you need to check those urges as much as possible. It's not that you can't answer necessarily, just try to be short with him. End conversations quickly so he'll get the hint that you're really not into his idea of just hooking up.
Also, you should give yourself a pat on the back for standing up for what you believe. This guy has tried really hard to get you to hook up with him, and you've stood up for yourself every time. It's really hard to do that when it's a guy you're interested in. Way to have some self-respect. I hardly ever see it anymore.
Darby(:
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