same person. if my asking questions gets annoying please just let me know. i dont want to be a nuisance.
but this is short and sweet. our sweetheart dance is in 2 weeks and i want to know if i should ask him to it. its all i have been thinking about and i want to but i know the reason that he might say no is because of ann. so i dont know if its even worth trying. thats also another reason i wanted to talk to his best friend and see if i should even go thru the trouble of asking.
but anyway thank you so much and dont worry about hurting my feelings if you tell me your tired of giving me advice on this guy. you have just been so much help already that i figure why not ask until i feel completely comfortable on the subject with him. plus as the week goes on and weekends pass more things may come up so thanks!
To be honest, there are really 2 choices and or reasons to ask him to the dance..,
one, you could persuade him to come with you by letting him know that it should be a night to remember and that friends will always be there fore eachother, yet if he goes with ann, and something bad happens between them (an argument or anything in general) then he the memories of the night might be reflected badly.. so try and let him know that it should be a fun night with good outcomes to it. you don't want him looking at it 2 years later and thinking what a night wasted with ann...
two, you could ask him because you want to.. what he says to you would be completely up to him and you will have to prepare yourself just incase he says something that you don't like. so i would suggest that you go up to him and ask whether he has considered taking anyone to the dance yet? and what his plans were... talk in a friendly way, i hate to say it, but if he feels like you are presuuring him, then he's not gonna be very comfortable telling you about it, but if he doesn't feel a threatened, then he'll give you honesty. I know it shouldn't be like this, but thats just the case.
If he doesnt know himself and finds it very hard to answer the questiong, that means you still have a chance to ask him.
Why don't you throw in something like "hey! i know, why don't we go to the dance together, we'll have so much fun.. you know, just a suggestion"
something like that could trigger his senses and possibliy realize that you are infact wanting him to ask you to the dance.
If you ask him straight away for a yes or no answer, then there's that possibility of him rejecting on the spot, but if you give him a way of letting him know you're intrested and wanting him to think about the idea, he might actually find it a good one!
so key rule: don't provide a yes or no questiong, always an open ended question, but being confident in what you're saying.
His best friend would know him yes, but his best friend isn't going to be that much of a help anyway. Whether you ask him or not, should be completely up to you and what you want to do. if you want to ask him, there shouldn't be a reason not to. If you have doubts in asking him because he might reject you, wouldn't you rather hear it from his mouth than his best friends, because i'll gareentee you'll wonder what if? later on.
so never take anyone elses answer for your decision, because the truth will only be unfolded by the person himself!
Feel free to ask anything. i'm fine with it, honestly!
oh... btw... why don't you get this so called "guy" on the site, so that i can knock some sense into his thick head?! :) just a thought! :p
(see how a joke can be more relaxing for the other person then if i was saying it seriously, and demanding it? same thing with my previous statement earlier..) [ miracle89's advice column | Ask miracle89 A Question ]
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