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a very long and complicated love story
Matt, i know this is long but please answer if you can. im so lost any suggestion would be amazing.
the first boy ive ever loved, kissed, gone out with, all of that is still in my head. we started daitng 3 years ago (wer both 14 now) and hes been in my head ever sense. i know he feels the same way and its scary because no matter how many times we break up we aways go back to eachother. it feels like we were destined to be together. and ithink we might be eventually. but...
whenever we have a relationship it gets so serous that im scared to even talk to him. if i do, we flirt nonstop, make all of these plans, and im scared where ittle leade. ive never been able to really get over him, i get butterflys just looking at him and i know he feels the same way. but i dont want to lose a high school experience by being with him, it hurts to talk to him because i feel it getting more serous and stronger by the minuite, but it hurts not to becayse i miss him so much. and i see him in shcool everyday and he just makes me laugh and hes never broken up with me i always break up with him because i feel myself getting too attached and i get scared and run away. i think i might really love him even though i know its not likely at this age. i know i love the way he makes me feel but icant let myself accept it. and he says he dosent want a relationship now but i know i could talk him into it but im not sure whats best. do you think theres a way i could really get over him? not talking to him isnt really an option, it would just be really awkward. hes in my classes so i have to see him everyday. i know i could try to get over him, but im not sure how to get over him for good. the second he looks at me or texts me all is lost and i fall for him again. please help
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In my opinion, the high school experience is a load of crap. It's something made up by those that graduated a long time ago as a way of dealing with nostalgia. It's spewed at those currently in high school as a bar of fun and enjoyment that they must clear. In reality, high school is not fun and games; most of the people I know hate high school and are ready for college.
So, take a step back for a moment. Would you rather go through high school with him, or would you rather go through it without him? Which memories do you think would be more valuable and cherished when you're older and someone asks you about your own "high school experience"? You seem to be able to keep things in perspective, so why suffer while hoping that maybe things will be even better? If you have a good thing, don't ruin it just because you're "supposed to".
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