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What you commented.
Thanks for saying what you did first of all.
I know and i HAVE realized that I am the one controlling whether I can really make friends or not. Everytime I do try, people just shut me out. I do keep trying, everyday, and im not trying to make excuses.
My class is LARGELY populated with native people. You'd have to be here to 'know' what I mean. Being native, smoking, and doing drugs is what makes you fit in. (I am 'part' native by the way). Its hard to find anyone that is clean.
The few people that aren't, are total jerks to me. They USED to be my friends but now they are the most obnoxious people. And i'm not talkin about my 'so called friend'. She's gone now. (even though she still chews on my brothers neck every night. Eww.)
There are a few people I DO hang out with. I only see them at breaks, they are in different grades and are VERY nice people :)
I am a very outgoing person, I do go out and do activities and whatnot, I am social.
The only thing is, i know im asking for a lot, but I really wish I had someone in my own grade that I could do things with. They just want to use me whenever I work with them, Even though I never give them the answers. Everyone in my class DOES NOT care about school and are WASTING others time. Today I think I did get closer to some people. But they already have their best friends.
I guess its good I have a 'few' other friends that I can be with. I do accept what I already have. And I am working in a positive way to find something new.
I know everyone can have more than one friend. But, it is HARD to find more than one BEST friend. Which I don't even have.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
i totally understand what you're saying. and to tell you the truth people are mean. almost my whole school also drinks and smokes and all of that and it annoys me so much, i dont like any of the people who do that. so that narrows the people i can be friends with, and i think your in the same situation.
i know what its like to be used and i know how it is to be shut out.
one day your gonna find someone that can be your reall bestfriend. i cant give you a day but for now be proud that your not one of those lame jerks who smoke and drink cause alothough they think its cool its TOTALLY NOT...
like you i also have friends that i hang out with and such but i dont have that one bestfriend anymore either and i hate reading peoples profiles or something and they say "i loveeee my bff." i get jealous to tell you the truth cause i dont have that. yet. :) but maybe one day that one person is gonna move to your school or something like that and who knows you could become best friends :)
i always say to myself "everything happens for a reason" and i also believe in fate, you don't have to but maybe all of this is just trying to make you stronger as a person. so just continue to be who you are. and that best friend will come along.
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