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lonely for too long
I haven't had a boyfriend in years. I'm not conceited, but I know I'm not ugly. Plus, in the place I live, it's not very hard to get attention. The thing is, why do I still not have a boyfriend? Sure I'm shy, but I see way uglier, shyer girls out there with boyfriends, and I can't figure out why I'm still alone. I'm not the kind of person to respond to some rude holler, or to go after some boy when I'm called. I may be picky, but I don't want to just settle for some horn dog. Am I being unreasonable or something? I'm Hispanic, but I'm tired of the guys I'm always around. I know it sounds weird, but I've never dated a white person. They seem much less rude and obnoxious, but getting people to try something new isn't easy. Since they're much less outgoing, how can I tell if they're even interested? How do I know they're not disgusted or something? Anyway, thanks for reading, and thnx in advance.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
All guys are obnoxious...no matter what color. Ha-Ha! Okay..let's leave the stereotypes alone and concentrate on you. The key to attraction is within not outside of you. Be the best you and have a positive attitude and do not disqualify friendships and potential relationships at first glance. You may meet the sibling or best friend of your perfect guy first, so keep an open mind. I am not saying to date or befriend people that are vastly below your standards, but just be aware that you never know how you will find your dream guy. When you do discover love or passion, let it be based upon mutual respect and not skin color.
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This might only answer parts of your question, but here's a question I answered before:
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From there:
First- I'm going to tell you that relationships aren't all they are cracked up to be. Sure- they are fun having someone to share things with and be with. But they involve a huge commitment and if you end up with someone who is clingy- they'll want to be with you every minute of every day- and you might not have time for friends or anything else you want to do. I say this because one of my ex-girlfriends was sort of like that- and got mad if I was busy with other plans.. and it was just really retarded.
Anyway- the best way to attract a guy is to be yourself. If you try to change yourself just to get a boyfriend [especially at your age]- you'll just end up with someone who only likes you for what you've become- not who you are. If you be yourself- and don't change- you'll attract more guys who actually care about your personality rather than just your looks.
I myself like any type of girl. I honestly don't judge looks as much as I do personality. If a girl is absolutely stunningly beautiful, but she's a bitch- why would I like her? What would our relationship be? What would we talk about? Her latest hair extensions? Yeah- that would be REALLY nice *Sarcasm: Party of one!*...
If a girl has a really nice personality- and she's really outgoing and sweet and nice and smart- and she's not necessarily the best looking girl- but she's not super unattractive- then I'll most likely want to date her over the beautiful bitch.
Do you get what I'm saying? If you let guys see your personality more than your looks- you'll end up with someone great. Trust me- most guys prefer personality over looks- they just don't know it yet =].
Now to attempt to answer your other questions:
A guy is interested when:
1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.
2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.
3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...
4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.
5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".
6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.
If you like this guy- and he does all or most of those things- my best bet is that he does like you. That means one and only one thing: Ask him to make sure, and then try the relationship out. Who knows- it could be great!
Some other useful links:
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--Jack
(16/m)
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Maybe you should start hanging out with people thats your same race? because if you have that in common it wont seem very weird. Also, you could just try to talk to a lot of guys, because if you do, they will be interested in you a little bit more, knowing your always there to talk to them when their bored and if they are all friends you could possibly get invited to hang out with the boys! And hun, a boyfriend isnt everything.. i wish i could live my life without one because it always turns out bad in the end. So don't rush it!
good luck<3
laura
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