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humorist-workshop
stuck n a love triangle
i am a 29yr old female and i had a affair on my husband about 4 yrs ago and the guy and i eventually got feelings for each other. We were both having problems n r marriages and he was going to get divorced, i didn't know that i wanted to at the time but i knew that i wasn't happy. The guy and i decided that we needed to try one more time with our marriages. Since then he has gotten divorced and we have ran into each other several times. About 2yrs ago he told me that he wanted me but i didn't want to just end everything for i have been married for a while. But now he remarried and we talk often, he called the ohter night and told me that he wasn't happy and wanted to come over to talk. I said fine since i am seperated now. Things went farther and now the old feelings are back and i am in love with him again..But my question is "do i tell him" and "what should i do" thanks for any advice i can get.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
It seems as if you two have been in a "hit-and-miss" relationship from the very beginning.
Listen, I cannot tell you what to do, but I can tell you the scenarios and let you make a decision that could affect both of your lives.
First, do you ever get the feeling that you two have been not available to each other for a reason? I am not a very religious person, but do believe that every thing happens for a reason. It could have been a test on your strength from the very beginning but both failed. It is not necessarily a bad thing.
Second, in all the situations that you two have been in, there have been others involved as well. There is a respect that a person must adhere to when dealing with someone else's feelings and emotions.
Love is a strong force to be reckoned with. True love is also very hard to find. Finding your one true love is difficult and tedious at best. When you find true love, you will know that it is right. It is definitely a feeling that will surpass any that you have felt before.
I will say that because both of you have had your fair share of infidelities, neither will trust the other because of the past experiences.
I think the best solution would be to sit down and talk with him. Put all the cards out on the table, let him know you are not pressuring him for a relationship, because that would be unfair to him and his new wife. Tell him that you realize that this is bad timing and do not expect him to reciprocate your feelings. Just to remember that if anything should happen between him and his wife, then you would like him to give you two a chance.
If you are serious about getting into a relationship with him, then you will not get married or start seeing someone serious for a little while, until you know exactly what is going to happen. There is no need to bring someonen else into this situation and get hurt too.
I hope this has made sense.
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