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humorist-workshop
a seprate question
i loved your answer. it's not always that you get someone who'd really helfull without all the sugar coating... and i really need this right now.
so before anything... i know i might sound spoiled -and maybe i am- but i really do try my best to get away from under that light and shift into something more modest... i know it sounds dumb but i am a 20 year old female and well... to be honest... i am scared of my father. lets just say he tends to be a bit too physical at times. i mean two days ago i was driving him somewhere since he still hasn't found an assistant and driver yet and i missed an exist because he was shouting in pulses and he got so mad he punched me and now my arm is all bruised and painful... the reason he moved close by (where i go to college) is "to keep an eye" on us... not to justify the 200 dollar membership i joined the gym out of fear and determined to get a bit stronger so it's mostly muscle training (it's a bit scary now that i have to quit)... the hair thing isn't because i don't want to go to a "cheapo hair cutter" its because the place i go to is where my mum's friends hang out and where i must climb the "social escalator with grace"... so i am sorry i came of that way... anyway thats not the case but just thought i'd hand you some background....
about the job... do you think i could find one without him knowing :S i've never worked and i haven't got the slightest clue how to begin looking for one that i could fit in between classes so he wouldn't know... what do i do? how do i find a job to start??
i also freaking out about my credit card! next month i'm paying a 1000 and i've locked up my card in the safe at the bank so thats the end of that. and i stopped buying them (my parents) stuff with it and sorta hinted about the problem (since i don't want to drive him mad) ... i know i can live on 500 dollars at least for the first three months. but i am so scared. do you think it's ok to pay it over a span of 3 months (jan, feb, march and maybe april and may) if need be? and will the bank really send someone over?
please help...
thank you so much for the first feedback and sorry about the horrible sentence structure, syntax and grammatical errors, i am a bit in a rush!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Personal Finance?
The bank cannot send anyone to your house looking for you. They don't work that way. All that will happen is constant calls and letters. They might sue you in court and get a judgment that means you must pay them what you owe.
Naturally, you can't do that until you have the money. Don't worry about how long it takes to pay them back. They aren't going anywhere and you can't do a thing until you have the cash anyway.
Some people take years to pay it back regardless of the amount. Nothing bad will happen to you except for a lousy credit score.
Your father has a severe problem if he's hitting you and ruling your life. If he's that abusive and you are scared shitless of him something is very wrong.
I urge you to enter counseling on your own to learn how to stand up to him and become an adult. He's keeping you right where he wants you by using fear to control your every movement.
You are living on your own now and calling the shots. You can get a job just about anywhere and need to do so. If he threatens or hits you file a police report. He'll soon knock that shit off.
I would go to a local movie theater, bookstore, grocery store etc. that hires part-time workers and ask to speak to the manager. Tell them it would be your first job and see if they have something open.
Forget climbing the "social ladder" at the the hair salon place entirely. You don't need to impress anyone by getting your hair done there or hanging out.
If they want to hang out with you they know where you can be found. Go some place cheaper. It's about staying afloat and not social status at this point.
More or less you need professional help to deal with your father and lead your own life. Go get a job. If he tries to hurt you involve the police no matter what. You'll never become an adult and self sufficient until you stop letting him dictate what you do.
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