|
My Friend thinks she's too fat and we try to tell her she's
Well I hang with a group f 5 including myself. We're all best friends and we always have a ton of fun. One of my friends, let's call her Madi, thinks she is fat. She is not fat! She only has a bigger structure! Big boned, a bigger frame. Some people would like to be like that and she's just convinced that because she is a little bigger, and stronger, she just thinks all that is fat. Example, We were at a sleepover, and we were talking about stuff ( I don't remember) but the subject was brought up, and she started complaining about herself, and how she's "fat" and "how she needs to lose 15 pounds by the end of the school yr" we AlWaYs tell her and reassure her that she is not fat, and we always list her good qualities and all the good things she can do with the body she has! We are all really getting sick and tired of this! What can we do to support her and help her realize that she is a special person who needs to realize she is special and should be satisfied with her body. She does vb, and basketball and softball each yr too. She's sporty, but she just isn't convinced. Please do not give answers like "just keep telling her she's not fat" or "just keep talking to her." I know that, we need to do that, but we also need something further to help her since she won't listen! Thank you!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Fitness?
well first of all, stop telling her over and over that she isn't fat, because that will just make you guys frustrated and her feeling like you are lying just to make her feel better. if she says i'm fat, just quickly respond "oh don't be ridiculous, you are definitely not" and change the subject. When you are around her, if you guys have weight/diet/sports conversations, just say things like you wish you could bulk up a little, or mention athletes who are thick, strong bodies or whatever. What i'm trying to suggest i guess, is to work things in subtly instead of trying to convince her. Like, for example if you guys are looking through a celebrity magazine, point out the women with curves and be like, "oh my god, she's so pretty" and stuff.
If you talk about her and try to convince her she's not fat all the time, it will just make her focus on it more, so just change subjects quickly.
I hope this helped a little bit, just try to always be there for her.
p.s. if you guys are hanging out at each other's houses, maybe you could lower the ammount of junk food you all eat so that she can eat healthier and won't get all depressed seeing skinny girls eat tons and not gain weight, which would probably frustrate her!
]
well first off you need to check her BMI(body mass index) to see if she really is fat. you can go to: www.am-i-fat.com
if she isn't "fat" then she could be the type of person who LOVES to be complimented and so in turn she says put downs about her self like "i am fat" or 'my hair looks like crap today" or even "my feet are HUGE".
Because they know that if they say that someone will say "no your not" or "you hair is pretty" or "my feet are bigger than yours!"
She also could have an eating disorder 'in-the-making' she may be really uncofortable w/ her body. I am gonna guess you a teenager and that is the HARDEST time for girls because you body goes through SO many changes and one day you hips will look huge and you arm will look too long. then the next day you hips look tiny and your arms look too short for you body. It is just a fact of teenage girl life. You are just going to have to point out that everyone looks out of proportion and shes not alone.
The best advice i can give you is to deal with it. and if it bother you ALOT sit down w/ her ALONE and say "i don't like it when you call yourself fat,because your not. And no matter how much you think you are, you're not! Believe me Madi, you ARE NOT FAT."
]
More Questions: |