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How to feel unguilty??
I'm 20 years old and I have a bf who's 21. My bf and I live in different city. Just this week, he went in our house to have his vacation. He's very much welcome in our house because my mum is a cool mum and my sister is so nice that they became close immediately. The problem is with my aunt. I already introduced my bf to my relatives and everyone likes him because he's a nice guy, except to my aunt. She was so angry because she said that it's not nice that a guy would come to a girl's house and sleep there.(we sleep in different room) My bf stayed with us in our house for 2 weeks. My aunt told us things that made me cry. She said that she's pretty sure that my bf and I already had sex and that maybe i wouldn't graduate from college because i maybe become pregnant, and many more. The rest of the family really didn't believe in this opinion of my aunt because they trust me a lot, especially my mum. The problem is that i'm GUILTY.. My bf and I already had sex but i told them that i wouldn't do it before our marriage and i assure my mum that nothing happened yet and that i really won't do it. She believed in me and she really trusts me. I really feel guilty. I don't want to tell the truth because first of all it would break their heart and i feel shame if they'll know it.. Please help me.. and should i stop having sex with my bf to make sure that i wouldn't become pregnant? Thanks a lot..
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You are 20 years old. You are not a little kid anymore. If you want to have sex with your boyfriend, it's YOUR business and ONLY your business. If you're worried about becoming pregnant, all you have to do is get on birth control. It's that simple. And, of course, use a condom, but I hope you already knew that. It IS possible to have sex without getting pregnant, so don't let that stop you from being intimate with your boyfriend. If being intimate that way is something you and your boyfriend want to do, then it's not up to your family to decide that for you. You do whatever makes you happy. Your family can keep their opinions on the subject to themselves.
As for your aunt, I understand she's your elder and all, but the next time she gets in your face, tell her she needs to grow up and mind her own business. Remind her that you are a big girl and you can do whatever you want. Whether or not you and your boyfriend are having sex is NONE of her business. I don't care if she's your aunt. She has NO RIGHT to talk down to you like that and make you feel upset over being with your boyfriend. Feel free to tell your aunt that nobody asked for her opinion and nobody cares what she thinks. She's obviously an old-fashioned nut that can't keep her big mouth closed.
When you do stand up to your aunt, make sure not to call her names or swear. Talk to her camly, but firmly. It will get your point across and you will be seen as more of an adult.
Good luck!
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