hello iv been going out with someone for nearly 10 months and im ususally confident, i say what i feel and i dont let anyone walk over me. but i find it hard standing up for myself with my boyfriend if he saya or does anything i dont like i keep quiet and if he does something to upset me i dont say anything. i think im scared of saying anything incase it starts a argument ( we have never had a row or even shouted at each other). we are both very easy going and i think sometimes he deliberatly does not contact me and im left sitting around for hours and hours waiting to hear from him.can someone please give me some advice as im not sure what to do. thankyou
Razhie answered Saturday May 12 2007, 5:44 pm: Grow a back bone and do it quickly!
You are loosing yourself in this relationship a bit and you are living in fear. That isn't healthy and can't possibly be making you happy. What is worst of all is that it sounds like you suspect your boyfriend is aware of you insecurity and may be walking all over you on purpose!
It's tough to change a pattern once you have it set, but you need to change this pattern were you keep your mouth shut.
I would bet you are afriad of loosing him right now, and that is why you are being so careful about not making him angry. Trust me hun, in five years you will regret loosing yourself in this relationship far more then you will regret have breaking up with some boy who wasn't treating ya all that well anyways.
So stand up for yourself, make yourself heard, and stop sitting around and waiting on him. Only then will you know if this relationship is savable, and more importantly, if it is worth saving.
It's always scarry when things aren't going so well, but it's far better to face your fears and deal with them, then to let them run your life. [ Razhie's advice column | Ask Razhie A Question ]
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