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I'm confused if i should have sex or not because i am not su
hi, i am a 13 year old female from california and there is this guy who last year in 7th grade we never ever went out and he said that i was a 6 or 7 as far as my face but my butt and personality was a 10. He is light-skinned and really cute and we used to have something. well last year i thought he was really ugly but in the middle of the year i thought he was so sexy because like his personality was wonderful. we are both libra's and we got off really well. he was charming and everything. i liked him from october to march until he got really really conceited...he went with this one girl who no one really knew about and everyone was suprised cuz we all thought it would always be me and him. thats how close we were. but i got over it. we messed around only once. in 8th grade at this party and it was wonderful. passion marks and touching, the works. nd he wanted to go all the way with him. i said no but then the next month it went around that i was messing with someone and he stopped talking to me. he would treat me like crap. call me bitch lame most of the time lame but hed always talk about me badly to his friends. this is 8th grade now and like we stopped talking october to now. he sent me a message asking to be friends because he wanted to end on a good note and i accepted it. recently i went to another get together and i messed with his best friend n my best friend messed with the guy... he texted me and told me like i remember when we used to thinking about fucking each other and i say like yeah i remember when u used to think about having sex me what about it and he tells me that he wishes i would have acted on it. he doesnt know why he wants to have sex with me he just said he did. he says he has never slept or tried to sleep with anybody besides me which i think could possibly be bulllshit as far as him never trying with anyone. but i know hes a virgin. i dont know what to do because this year he has gotten kinda cute. i have lost all feelings for him. i have no more feelings for him whatsoever but i mean he's kinda of a player...he girls think hes sexy but too conceited...by senior year im sure he will has gotten into everyone and here he is asking me to be his first time. i know the first time is always not as exciting and i dont want to disappoint him but i would really like to have sex with him casually because its his first time, which is like like whenever he has sex he'll always know that i was his first... the first time is major. i want to lose my virginity to him but he treated me like crap..so i dont know what to do. i cant stand him and we dont have a relationship...but i wouldnt mind doing him...i always constantly think about sex and i know us doing it wouldnt mean anything...so maybe i could do it and just say it wasnt my first time?what should i do?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Let's look at your own words.
'He got really conceited.'
He dated another girl.
'He stopped talking to me.'
He called 'me bitch or lame.'
'He's always talk a=badly about me to his friends.'
He rated your body with numbers.
'I have no more feelings for him.'
'He doesn't know why he wants to have sex with me.'
You think he's a bullshitter.
He's a player.
'He treated me like crap.'
'I can't stand him.'
'We don't have a relationship.'
'Us doing it wouldn't mean anything.'
And then let's look at your other statement: 'The first time is major.'
When you look objectively at how this guy treats you and how you feel about him, is this really something you want to happen? Particularly when it's as big as losing your virginity? You can choose to say you never did it, but it will not erase the actual sex.
It sounds like you are worried about disappointing him, but that you want to get some sort of hold on him - you'll always be his first. What you seem to be forgetting is that HE will always be YOURS - and is this the type of guy you want to live with you in memory for the rest of your life? He is bound to disappoint you, not the other way around.
It's okay to always be thinking about sex. That's what people sometimes do. It's not okay to have sex because someone else wants to, particularly when you clearly already have massive doubts.
Nothing I can say will be as powerful as what you have already said. So please, reread your words and think very carefully about this situation.
I wish you the best, and I believe you deserve it.
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