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best friend
i saw your answer to someones question about their love life. and you gave great advice so please help me out with this one.
ok well my best friend he is just so wonderful. hes the nicest guy in the world, well to me he is. lol. its a long story. first i liked him in like mid january. after a week i told him about it. and i guess you could say he led me on into thinking he liked me too. everyone, especially me, was surprized when he said he didnt like me. so then valentines day was a mess and two weeks after i decided i needed to move on, meanwhile we were becoming closer friends so i knew that i had to let go of any "feelings" for him because the longer i waited, the harded it would be. so i let go of him. an it was wierd how i really stopped seeing him as more than a friend. a girl asked if i liked him right in front of him and i said "no". a week later another girl who is in our close circle of friends revealed she liked him. he didnt really do anything about it. i guess he learned not to lead girls on. and so when i heard that she liked him somthing inside me smapped and then bam i like him again. that was in early march. now its early april and he still doesnt know how i feel about him. out of all of the girls i am his best friend. and so a week ago he told me that he was gay (or confused i guess you could say) but not anymore. he said he is no longer gay. and so that explains everthing. it all amkes sense why he didnt like me and why he led me on and everything. he was trying to prove to himself whether or not he was gay i guess. he always flirts with me, like 24/7 haha, and he tells me he loves me in a playful way. so idk sometimes i could swear he likes me other times its really cold. and so a girl advised me to kiss him and see how he reacts. what do you think i should do. i dont want to tell him how i feel but in the right situation i just might. but understand that it was the wost regection of my life when he said he didnt like me. he led me on and it hurt so bad. i dont want that again, please help. thank you so much!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
That is a bit complicated. First off, this guy is confused not only about his feelings for you, but about his feelings about his sexuality, and girls in general. It is a great compliment that he has chosen to open up to you and that he considers you to be such a good friend. He does not want to lose you, but now is not the time to pressure him. I have known many gay men that are flirtatious and sexual with women, but that are still gay. You cannot change him. Let that be a life lesson about anyone. We cannot pick and change anything about anyone. Many women have the idea that men are more like clay and can be molded and transformed to look like whatever they need. The problem is that you are still left with a pile of clay and it does not hold its shape under pressure. It returns to what it IS. Continue to be a best friend, and let him have room to grow and be comfortable as he discovers for himself who he is. Don't hold out for him as a boyfriend. Go out with other guys and don't limit yourself. Take his flirtations lightly and know that it does not mean the same as if he were not confused about his gender identity. He may indeed discover that he is heterosexual, but it may be years from now or not at all. It is his journey not yours. I want you to live your own journey and enjoy and not miss out on the other guys who would love to date you and are secure with their sexual identity and won't end up breaking your heart...at least not like this.
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