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I don't get it.
I'm 13/f
One of my guy/friends asked me out today, and my friend put me under a lot of presure of what tosay, so I said I'd think about it. He smiled and went on about his buisness. Then like, 10 seconds after the last bell rang one of my friends told him I'd said yes, but I hadn't.
Then at 4:59(sry 'bout that, I do that all the time) one of my other guy/friends who had him over called and asked me what I was gonna say because he wanted to know. As I said earlier, I hate being under so much as the tiniest bit of pressure, and I said "I guess." Know, I wish I could go back in time or kill myself. I don't like him, I like another guy, I don't totally trust him, and my mom said I couldn't have a boyfriend until I was 16. So now, I am disobaying my mother(whom I love very much and hate disobaying) gong against my scences, betraying myself( since I like someone else), killing myself from so much pressure, guilt, and worry, afraid I'll hurt him, might loos a friend, and wishing I could kill myself. HOW HORRIBLE!!!! HOw would I break up with him without hurting him or lossing his friendship???
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Dear Under Pressure,
Well first off you need to go tell your "friends" how you feel and that they really need to mind their own business. Secondly, you need to go tell your "boyfriend" the truth because it seems unfair that he's getting the short end of the stick. THEN, you need to stay single and straighten everything out. THen after that's done, take a nice bubble bath to wash away your worries. You need to tell your "boyfriend" and your "friends" to mind their own business. "Under Pressure by your peers (in this case your "friends")" is known as PEER PRESSURE. You have to learn how to deal with it because by your age, i'm guessing your either in 7th or 8th grade. You really have to deal with it BECAUSE once you get into high school and later on in the school year you're really going to go nuts if you dont deal with the problem NOW. Some ways I got over this was to not worry about the tinest things. Like if I didnt have one homework assignment done, I would say, well okay I'll just get done what i can finish before that class. You already made the mistake, so why dwell on it? Move FORWARD, talk to ur "friends and boyfriend" and tell them everything. And as for the guy you actually like, give it a month or so, maybe after the holidays, and then start making your move on him. Or else people are going to start calling you names that arent so great. Also, THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK. if you say the wrong thing, your friends arent effected by it. YOU ARE. And if you ever feel pressured, tell them to back off. If you are mad at your friends right now, you have every right to be! So let me know how it goes! Good Luck!
Sincerly,
Lisa xox
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Tell him the truth. Tell him that your friend went ahead without your okay and told him yes. He should understand. He might be a little hurt at first, but things will be fine. Just explain the situation to him. Try to be sensitive about it and listen if he has anything to say. I wouldn't recommend telling him you like someone else. That would make him feel bad. Just let him know that you love being friends but you don't feel any chemistry between the two of you and you just want to keep it at a friendly level
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This is a toughy because the guy obviously likes you enough to have the courage to ask you out. The best thing for you to do is just talk to him. Tell him that you dont really want a bf right now bc you have a lot of other things going on and you were under pressure when the question was asked. DONT tell him that you like someone else bc that would just hurt his feelings. Tell him that you really appreciate him asking you out but its just not the right time for you right now, and let him know that you would still love to be friends with him. If you're nice and sincere about it, he should understand! :) Let me know if you need anything else!
♥
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