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Surprise!
So, I've been friends with this guy for about almost 3 years now and we've been dating almost for 2. I'm really in love with him and I trust him and he's the only one I can turn to knowing he won't let me down. He's always been there for me, except recently he mentioned something that kind of scared me, he said he wanted sex. This really surprised me, we're both virgin and I know that sex should be with someone you trust and love and he feels the same way, but at first we both wanted to wait for marriage. I'm positive 100% he's not only dating me for sex because if he was he would've asked a long time ago, right? Well, I really don't know what to do and we both agreed that we want our relationship to graduate to a higher level and we want to give each other our first time but I don't think I'm ready. Any help would be much appreciated! And thank you in advance!
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if your not ready i would definently not do it. you might regret it l8er. just wait till you know 100% that there would be no way you would regret doing it and that its realy what you want
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There are two parts to this:
If this guy is really understandng and loves you and trusts you as much as you trust and love him, he will understand if you don't want to have sexwith him just yet. Just tell him that you're not quite ready and you still want to wait and see what happens. If he truly loves you, he'll understand and still love you. You on the other hand shouldn't be pressured into giving up your virginity. You decide when you want to and no one else. Just have sex when you're ready. Either wya both of you guys should understnad and still love each other no matter the outcome of this.
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If you really care about him then you need to feel comfortable talking to him about this sort of problem and if talking to him means saying you aren't ready, then so be it.
You say a while ago, you both agreed you wanted to wait for marriage. How does he feel now about that agreement? Would he be prepared to honour that or would he rather have sex now? If what you want doesn't match what he wants any more, then it may be time for you to go your separate ways.
The only think you can do is discuss it with him. Once you know what he wants, that gives you an opportunity to think about what you want. Do you still really want to wait until you are married? Whether you want to or not, it is all moot if you aren't ready and that is something you really do have to explain to him. If he truly does care about you, he won't have a problem waiting until you are ready and if that happens to be sex before marriage, he needs to decide whether he cares about you enough to wait that long or if he would rather have sex before then.
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