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me again!
hey, im the girl who asked the question about the boy who gets sooo close to other girls..
okay i like that whole say "aww" instead of "i miss you too" thing.. but here's some more details, because i dont really know who acting like that would work in my case..
see maybe you got that already, but he lives kinda far away, and i only see him once in a while, next time i see him will be xmas. And the thing is, i cant play that whole "we're just friends" game because that's not the kind of relationship we have. We met a few years ago, he had a girlfriend, but we flirted like crazy.. he kept saying "if i didnt have a gf i would kiss you right now" but i didnt wanna kiss me or let him kiss me because that would be totally disresepctful towards his gf! so anyway, we talked online ALOT and he was always like "if i dont have a gf next time you come...-" you know what im saying right? so i was like "what excactly are you thinking cause alot of things are going through my mind right now!" and he'd be like "haha, im just saying..if both of us are single, make sure you give me a call!" (the reason im telling you this is so you understand we're not really friends..like there's no point in meeting him at all if my intentions are just to be friends.. we both know it.. its like, the times ive been in his town, when ive had a boyfriend, i dont call him, but the times ive been single, ive called him.. you understand? like whenever one of us cant be more than "just friends" we're nothing, we dont talk, we just postpone it until next time when we're single..
so how do i do this? how do i show him that he needs to make a move, and let go of other girls (i dont wanna tell him!) i liked the idea of saying "aww" insetad of "i miss you" and things like that.. but how can i do more things like that in my situation??
he's not really a jerk, he's actually really romantic, and treats me really well, but he doesnt take me as seriously as i take him, ve built my whole life around him, he doesnt even know anything about me..
should i really try to get over him? cause im not sure it'll work! and if so, should i just make sure not to see him this xmas?
thank you soooooooooooo much!
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Hey there again!
Look, I know this guy isn't a jerk, but it honestly doesn't matter what kind of guy he is. I mean, it's just really unfair to hear that you've liked this guy for years and nothing has happened. I don't mean to make you feel hurt or anything, but you should have given up a long time ago.
I know you guys have an intense friendship that may not be where you can just turn off your normal mode with him, but in a way you have to. He always says, "If only I didn't have a girlfriend" as if he has no control. If he really wanted to be your boyfriend so much, he would have broken up with his girlfriend and went for you. He's had tons of chances to be with you and tons of time to dump a current girlfriend and make his move, but he didn't.
Did you consider the possibility that maybe he was joking? Let me tell you, I just went through this thing with this guy where he would make comments to me that were very flirty and I fell for them hard and he turned around and said it was a joke. This completely crushed my feelings because he even told me afterwards that they weren’t jokes and he flat out denied it because he had a girlfriend. So I mean maybe this guy is playing with your mind and hasn't had the brains to tell you that he doesn't mean it. I don't know if that’s true, but it could be.
You can play off the whole, "We're just friends" thing. You may not be feeling that way, but you can act like it towards him. If you do it enough, you will start going by that. As long as you don't show your emotions to him and only behind closed doors where he'll never know, he will be fooled. Don't convince yourself that you can't get over this guy. Sure, there will always be a special feeling you have when you see him, but you are capable to truly move on and get over this guy because he doesn't want to make his move. You can't really keep seeing him and flirting with him and listening to his, "If only I didn't have a girlfriend" comments only to be crushed when another year goes by of the exact same routine.
I think its best that you don't see him very often like you said. You should spend that spare time with friends or off somewhere else instead of being at home and thinking about him and getting on the internet to check his away messages and all of those other things that involve him.
I think your best bet is to try your hardest not to see him for a while. It won't make you happy, but it will make you better in the long run to feel happier without him in your life. I can't tell you what to do, but I think it could make you a lot stronger if you really saw how much fun you can have with other guys and not just him.
I really hope I've helped in some way, if you need any further help, you know I'm here:)
-TheTeenGirl
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