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more than friends
this shall be long. i dont even kno where to begin. so, i met this guy.. 3ish months ago i believe.. n since then, weve become like best friends. i talk to him every day n we can talk about everything n jus yeah, were real cool with each other. well, hes liked me as more than a friend for about 2 months now.. n lately hes really gettin to where hes real open about it. like seriously jus about every day hes always sayin how amazing i am n how he likes me more than i could ever kno n how any guy who goes out with me is so lucky.. blah blah blah, n i do believe hes serious about it. n ive been kinda actin like i like him too but not really.. like he'll tell me he loves me n stuff n i wont say it back, ill jus smile n say 'i kno' or ill joke it off n be like 'im suuurre you do' or somethin like that. he doesnt mind that much that i do that, but like whenever we go places together or whatever ill let him hold my hind or put his arm around me.. n tonight he gave me a good nite kiss for tha first time. im really wondering what i should do.. bc like i think he may realize that im not sure how i feel about him.. and im kinda in that position where, i do kinda like him as more than a friend, but i dont think i like him enough to go out with him.. and plus im totally not into gettin in a relationship rite now. bc firstly im lovin the single life n also bc like last month i met this other guy n i fell real fast for him but that ended up not workin out soo maybe im not quite over that feeling?? i dunno what to do if he asks me out like fer real.. cuz i dont wanna say yeah n not be into him like i should be to be goin out, but i dont wanna lose him either cuz im real afraid if he asks n i say no that things will be real different between us n ill regret sayin no n wish i coulda had him. im sooo lost =(
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wow, lately i seem to be finding a lot of these questions where someone has a friend who likes them, and they're not sure what to do about it. i hope this doesn't sound too bad, but, perhaps this is the beginning of a kinda good trend?? :P i mean it in the sense that not so many people are worrying too much about the likes/loves of their lives. not there's anything wrong with that; but i digress (and so early in the answer too!).
well you caught me at the right time to ask me a question like this. just met a guy and you've become great friends, he likes you, you almost think you may like him (just not quite enough to date him), it's difficult to be sure about how to act at certain times with him, et cetera, et cetera... i was at a performing arts festival this weekend, and i only knew one person there (from the beginning, outside of the festival). it was my friend raevyn*, who i actually dated when i was a freshman. for a while after we broke up, it seemed like he didn't want to talk to me even though we said we'd still be friends; apparently i was COMPLETELY WRONG. ^_^; sorry, random tidbit for any other people this happens to; sometimes it just happens that you don't talk much for a while, and then suddenly, BOOM, you're friends again, even better than before!
anyways, my point on how you caught me at a good time. now, obviously these people weren't completely serious (at least i don't THINK so...), but do you know how many marriage proposals i got?? five. three from girls, and two from guys, all of whom i adore. the girls' proposals i was used to (and guinevere* is going to be my wife-in-law so... ^_^ ), but the other two were different than my normal requests-for-my-hand. the first came on the second day at the festival: auberon* and i were sitting at a lunch table with lots of other people so we were all squished up, and i said something profound or very intelligent and he suddenly looked me straight in the eyes and dead-seriously asked "will you marry me?" well i'm not gonna think he means it! he lives in illinois, and we're not even 20 yet (and i have a boyfriend of almost two years of whom i'm rather fond of... ~_^ ), so i said in my natural playful way, "why of course i will! how could i say no?", and we played it like we were promised to on another and introduced each other as fiancee for the rest of the week. a few minutes later he proposed to guinevere*; i didn't know it at first, i asked him something and he turned and put his arm around her and said...
AUBERON: "i just asked her to marry me too."
KITTY: "oh, how wonderful! can i still play with guinevere?"
GUINEVERE: "what are you talking about? he's still going to marry you too!"
AUBERON: "i'm going to be a mormon, so you'll both be my wives."
KITTY: "ah! of course, what a great idea! that means we'll be wife-in-laws, guinevere*!!"
(the second proposal from a guy came indirectly on the last night. on a napkin he wrote "lysander levushka* (your future husband)" and then his email address. <shrug> he hugged me a bunch, gave me a few kisses on the cheek, wants me and him to sing a duet next year... that seems to fit with my other four proposals. ^_^)
blah, so, THE POINT of my preceding prattle, which i draw directly from the piece i performed just last night: don't take life so seriously. just take things as they come. don't plan ahead too much. and don't think too much either. how's that for wisdom so far? <pausepausepause> hm, that sounds pretty dull, doesn't it? well, it'll sound better...with music! <i now refer you--and your friend, if you wish--to the PIPPIN broadway musical soundtrack, track #6, song title "no time at all">
you guys are young! it's good that you're friends, you should stay that way as long as you can. don't rush ahead, take the time to get to know each other and hang out and gain great memories. as for him putting his arms around you and holding your hand and whatnot, if it doesn't bother you and you both communicate and understand that this kind of physical contact doesn't imply (or even necessarily refuse future) different feelings you have for him. again i look at my guy-friend relationships: raevyn*, my freshman bf i just re-met, tickled and held me and cuddled and snuggled with me every chance we got, especially last thursday when a bunch of us were all watching "family guy" at someone's host family's house. the only reason we're comfortable doing that is because we are such good friends, b/c we love each other to death, b/c we are such close and kindred spirits, that we know that nothing like that is going to happen (i have a boyfriend and he has a near-fiancee--the real kind ^_^ --).
so, bwaHA! i have bested you at longness, methinks. :P you're not lost, lovey. you're just sitting on a rock in the woods, wondering about moments that you've had and could have and might have someday. <and now, once again, i refer you--and your friend, if you wish--to the INTO THE WOODS broadway musical soundtrack, tracks 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 12, 13, and 19, but ESPECIALLY #15 entitled "any moment"/"moments in the woods"> (wow, two broadway musical references in one answer...i need help...)
anyways, if you have any other questions or news on the situation or any other info you'd like to give me, go ahead and email me again. i'd love to hear from you!
hope this helped. good luck!
~*kitty*~
POSTSCRIPT: names with "*"s after them have been changed for privacy reasons and for my own general amusement.
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