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poem
so you said you were a writer well im not so bad myself but i wanted to get "a writers" opinion on a poem i wrote.please be honest!i dont know where it came from!i didnt even brainstorm i just wrote it down and didnt change a thing so here it goes!(oh yeah its a little strange but im not like the person in this poem at all so dont worry!) Im sitting in my desk,books on my desk,nice and neat,nice and neat.i hear,i see,i feel the people around me laughing,screeming,cheering.They do not see me,no one sees me.I fall.land.its dark,cold wet,lonely.no one hears my screams.I can not scream,nothing comes out.I see a small light in the corner of this unfamiliar room.I walk twards it,not thinking,not viewing these consequences.The light turns off.Its dark.I emty again.Alone again.Again my imagination takes me.My mind wild with questions.I fall.I quickly grasp the air.I feel nothing.I open my eyes,cautious.Its to bright.I close them.Its clearer now.Im in a room.Daylight pours threw.no stopping it.I hear,I see,I feel,children all around.They hear me,they see me,they feel me.The unfamiliar overwelming joy rushes through my weak body.I feel,i finnaly feel... I lift my head up.Im sitting in my desk,books on my desk,nice and neat,nice and neat.I hear,I see,i feel the people around me.Laughing,screeming,cheering.They do not see me,no one sees me. I scream. They look. They hear. They see. They feel. sooooo. how was it?what dos it say to you?what are you feeling when your reading it?just need some feedbac!thax a bunch!
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Teenangstalicious!
I gotta say, every kid out there is writing angsty and sad poems and posting them on myspace. It just gets to too much where the entire genre is overused. You should try writing something that everyone else isnt doing.
Im not bashing the poem or anything, you should just try to talk to someone who specializes and specifically likes those kinds of poems.
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