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Boyfriend issues
Ok, there was this guy at my church who really liked me for a long time. One day we were writing notes to each other and at the end of church service he asked me out and i said yes. Everything was cool for a while, when i talked to him on the phone he was real koo, he was nice and seemed like the guy i could carry a coversation with. Then when i would see him he would put on a big act infront of my friends and not even talk to me. He NEVER called me on the phone either. Then one of my friends called him to see why he was not calling and it turns out he ws cheating on me with some gurl from his old school and he made out with some other girl and got stripe throat(lol). Remember he does not know i know he is cheating on me. So i call him another day and pretend like everything was ok and he hung up on me when i got back on the phone after saying hang on. After he hung up the phone i called back thinking he did not hear me say hold on, but he ignored my call. Later he claimed that his phone went dead, but i dont belive that. Oh yeah he also told my friend that he liked me but not enough to go out with me which is a lie because he is the one who bought it up on the notes in church that one day. But anyway i am going to break up with him, but after all the things he done to me i still want to call him and remain friends. Is this werid? My friends might have pressured him a little bit but its cause they are mi amigas. I still kind of want to be his girlfriend also, but i am not sure if it is because i really like him or i just like the idea of having a boyfriend? I am SO confused!!! But how can we remain friends?
P.S Sorry it is so long
P.S.S. Important info: the guy has just lost his grandmother and switched schools could this be why he is acting weird? Also before he asked me out i did not like him as more than a friend i just said yes to him to give him a chance, but now i actually like him.
PLEASE HELP!!!!!!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You know what, I think you aren't looking at the whole picture. You seem to enjoy the idea of having a boyfriend, I think. Tell me this, what do you look for in a guy? Be completely honest with yourself. For example, I look for loyalty, personality, a good balance, someone to make you feel like you're their whole world. Now, if I was going out with this guy, I'd have to say to myself does he have these qualities. Loyalty? Cheated on me. Personality? How could I tell if he doesn't call? A good balance? To me it doesn't seem like he knows what he's doing. He obviously has his own insight on women because he has another girl and states that he didn't like you enough to go out with you. He has no balance what so ever because it sounds like he doesn't know what the hell he's doing. You get the idea.
My whole point of this is to make you realize that you should want to make yourself happy before anything else. Why would you put up with his shit? First of all, he's playing the wrong card on you. Meaning that he's using excuses, cheating on you, and telling things behind your back. You don't need this. It will lead you in the wrong directions and you'll have mixed emotions through out the whole relationship. I say, if you are going to have a relationship don't just go for the "oh, but at least I have a boyfriend now". Find a guy that fits your needs, a guy who you won't have to question, and a guy who is willing to be your back up and make you feel special. You deserve more. Why would you settle for anything less. You are better than that.
And O.K. so he's been through a rough time. But you can't be his back up right now. That is no excuse for the way he's acting towards you. He's be using those reasons to try and cover it up. No, it's his fault because he is in control of his actions either way.
If you want to be friends that is totally your choice. But That could get rough at times and I'd make sure he settles down a bit before even considering it.
Sorry it was kind of brutal, but that's my opinion on it. Take care sweetie! Please try and not be like all the others, it's better to find someone right for you.
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