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Question Posted Saturday December 3 2005, 6:58 pm

I feel so depressed. I feel as if everyone in my life is moving on. I feel as tho I have no friends I spend my saturdays doing nothing, i feel as tho everyone hates me and Ive thought about sucide.
I have an incurable skin disease its so ugly and difiguring and the only cure for it is sunlight. I live in a cold place and my mum wont let me use tanning beds even tho thats the only cure.
I havnt got a boyfriend, and I dont trust anyone. I cant teell anyine about my skin disease. I feel so ugly and gross all the time. PLEASE HELP!!
What can I do??


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Dr_Chad answered Wednesday December 7 2005, 5:31 pm:
You need to get treatment for your psoriasis! See this website for information on psoriasis and how it is treated:

[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)

Your inflamed, scaly skin is damaging your self-image, which in turn is destroying your self-confidence and lowering your self-esteem.

If the psoriasis can't be treated effectively and you must live with it, then you should get counseling. As a teenager, you are in your most formative years, and how you learn to see yourself now can have a lasting impact in your life.

Dr. Chad

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susana answered Sunday December 4 2005, 12:29 pm:
Do you know the name of the skin disease you have? Are you being treated by a dermatologist? You mention that you need sun to cure this disease. Do you maybe have vitiligo? If you do, please be careful with sun exposure. It can make it worse. However, certain kinds of light therapy are recommended and this site can tell you about that as well as give you info about other diseases or disorders of the skin: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)

If you can't find your particular skin disease at this site, you can always Google the name of your disorder and see what sort of info you can gather. The more you know about your skin disease the more you can do for it.

I'm really sorry that you are feeling so depressed. Depression is an all too common illness that affects teens and adults. Please ask your mom to take you to a counselor or your doctor so that you can possibly get some medication to help you through this time. Antidepressants can truly help you feel better even if they don't take away what is actually at the root of your depression. More often than not, a person needs antidepressants along with counseling. If you don't think your mom will help you (and I'm betting she will!), try talking to your school counselor and see what she or he has to recommend. When a person begins to think about suicide it's definitely time to do something about the depression. In a more aligned world, we wouldn't get depressed or we would seek help before it got too bad. Please remember that your pain WILL END one day, but taking your life will cause pain to others that will never end. I'm sure you don't want to do that. Plus, and most importantly, you're young and there is still so much more to life than NOW. "Now" will eventually disappear and better things will come along. You don't want to miss out on the exciting mysteries of the future.

Why is it that you don't trust anyone? Have you been hurt severely by friends/boyfriends in the past? Or have things gone on in your homelife that make it difficult to trust? These are things you need to work on in counseling. It's okay that you keep yourself at somewhat of a distance with people until you know them better, but to not trust "anyone," is sad and unhealthy. You talk about not being able to tell anyone about your skin disease...does that mean that it isn't visible to people when you go out because of your clothes? If this is the case, why then would you want to talk about something so personal unless you found someone you really felt comfortable confiding in? If your skin disease is visible, then you still don't owe anyone an explanation UNLESS you want to talk about it.

My guess is that you are NOT ugly! Very few people are. And I know you hear this all the time, but it really is true: It's not what's on the outside that counts, but what's on the inside. Try to let people see what's on your inside; let them see what a great person you surely are. Hold your head up high and tell yourself each and every day that you are beautiful and worth all that is good. At first you may not believe these words, but if you can say this over and over again, you will eventually believe it just as you've made yourself believe you're ugly because you've obviously told yourself this over and over. Try changing how you look at yourself and others will follow. Can you get involved in any activities at school that would help you meet people? Having a boyfriend right now is not the most important thing. Having friends and being a good friend are much more important. Trying to work on your self-esteem is imperative and you might need professional help to get you started.

Please let me know if you need to talk some more or if you've been able to take some of this advice. You can e-mail me if you want: soysusana@verizon.net I want you to feel good about yourself no matter what. I think it's great that you've reached out for help through this site. Please don't give up on yourself. I care.

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hopeihelped answered Sunday December 4 2005, 2:22 am:
You're probably at that age where you just feel like crap. Maybe you need a different approach with your mom and the tanning beds. Your mom would probably feel more comfortable with you going to a dermo instead of tanning beds. And as for having no friends, I'm sure that's untrue. You just can't be so picky with who you hang out with. As for now, chin up! Stop focusing on your appearance and you will honestly feel so great about yourself. Last year was THE WORST year of my life, but this year I've been SOOOOOOOOOOOO much better as I realize all that I have. You should do the same.

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Kristen03 answered Sunday December 4 2005, 12:12 am:
Depression is pretty common with teens lately. You can't feel this way about yourself, and suicide isn't the answer. Suicide helps nothing, it only makes things worse. Trust me, you may feel that no one at all cares about you..Everyone feels that way at times. Things will eventually chance. Life is more important than friends. And boyfriends only give you more troubles, you're better off without them. Trusting people isn't always good either. Your looks shouldn't matter, if people can't accept the way you look then don't worry about them. I'm sure you're incredible and beautiful on the inside, and that's all that matters. You can't let people ruin your life. Try to take antidepressant medicines, and if you ever need somebody to talk to..I'm a pretty trustworthy person and you can email me if you feel the need to. My email address is cinderella_x33@yahoo.com ..I hope my advice helped at least a little bit.

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