Question Posted Wednesday November 2 2005, 12:34 pm
I really appreciate your advice-i also agree. I was just saying today at work that i tell myself i will not bring it up when we talk but yet i always do! b/c i am afraid if i dont say something he will drift farther away. I never looked at it the way you put it so yes i will also try to do that. I have to realize if he truely does love me he will be back on good terms and when he is not confused and if he doesnt come back he never truely loved me--right? or maybe he does love me but only b/c i helped him get through his feelings for his ex? thisis so hard and it makes me sick to know he is ok with everything right now-and i am not. what am i doing? besides going crazy
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life? LadyGoodman answered Wednesday November 2 2005, 8:28 pm: You're not going crazy, you're just crazy in love with a man who is not meeting your needs. Things that normally would seem like not such a big deal become the whole world. It's hard to get out of the habit of not bringing up the negative, but over time I suppose one just learns to convince oneself that it's for the better. You might even be able to set up a limit. Start out by bringing it up once per conversation, but not sticking on the topic for more than a minute or two. Then once a week, once every two weeks, etc. I think that's kind of what I had to do at one point. If he doesn't come back, it doesn't necessarily mean he never loved you, he either just doesn't love you now or can't make things work with you, and sometimes it's just how it goes. It really sucks... but then again you can look at it as a blessing in disguise...you will become stronger from this no matter what. Keep hanging in there. I hope for the best! [ LadyGoodman's advice column | Ask LadyGoodman A Question ]
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