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16 male
im going out with this girl sort off and we love each other and has said that to each other but i dont want to feel in love i dont want to be in love with her and i dont want her to love me back i dont no why its how i feel so i told her that and she said well i cant not tell u how i feel about u because i said can we jus like not say our feelings for each other but now she wont even talk to me what should i do?
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Alright, here is the deal. For the first time, I have been asked a question to which I haven't an answer. I apologize. The thing is, I've never been in love... probably nothing even remotely close to it. I haven't the tiniest clue on where to begin instructing you. :/
Seeing as how I fail to relate in the slightest bit, I asked my best friend for his assistance. His name is William. He's 19. He has an advice column: ULTRATUNAMAN (but I think he lost his password, for future reference. But, of course any questions for HIM can be sent here).
Here is what he has to say:
"well first off dude what you need to do is apologise to her for breaking her heart. and secondly think about this. this girl will someday be some guys husband. and she will someday be with someone who really does want to love her. do you want to screw up her feelings towards love because you "don't want to feel that way"? do you want to alter her perception of love just because you can't handle it and aren't mature enough for it? you've got to think here man. this girl will be in love with someone some day and that someone wants to have her, 100% of her, not a fraction, not a part all of her. so you've got to apologise and patch things up as best you can because if you let her go like that she's going to feel as though she can't be loved, as though she is undeserving, and not good enough or not pretty enough. and to stomp on a flower that has yet to even bloom is murder. do not kill off her feelings, her hopes, and her dreams. go to her, apologise, but stay firm in your stance just the same. say how you feel but at the same time be a shoulder for her to cry on cause i know chicks at that age can get pretty naieve about the issue of love and become something of an emotional wreck when it is destroyed. just lok at it like this: somewhere on this earth the girl that could be the love of your life could be being mistreated by a guy she loves too and she could be going through the same stuff. and you know as much as i do that when a guy knows a girl he cares about is hurt he'll do anything to protect her. on that same note, do not hurt a girl that some other guy could someday care for very deeply."
Anyhow, I apologize again for not being a help, myself. If you ever feel the need for a second opinion, feel free to come back. I promise you I'd try my very hardest to help you out. In the mean time, I hope you were able to find some comfort in his response. :)
♥ Mackenzie ♥
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Wow. Okay, well its not your fault because you just didn't feel in love with her. I think you should tell her that you're sorry, and you couldn't fall in love with her. And that you want to be friends. Hopefully she will understand!
♥ MELISSA ♥
=)
Best of Luck
Bye!
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