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what do i do.
I want to have sex for my boyfriend, he likes it all the time, but i dont enjoy it at all. Unless am drunk, But he dosent like me to drink either do i. It hurts and it fells like am being raped because it hurts so bad. So i have to use a lot of oils to help it. We try everything differnt poistions, role playing, porn. nothing works. I have cumed once and we have been having sex for 5 years. Dont know what to do. Help please.
Am 20 years old and have a child Is that the problem?
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The problem is that you guys aren't having sex for you.
You need to tell your bf that you don't enjoy it. And explain to him why.
If he doesn't understand then you should just let him go because a real bf that loves you, will understand. And if he doesn't understand then all he wants you for is SEX. Not for your love.
-love.
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The problem is that you aren't having sex for you - or for your relationship - but for your boyfriend. It can take time to find out exactly what you like, and you need to carve out some time and space to do that.
First, masturbate. Be alone with yourself (can your bf babysit?) and just relax. Don't feel pressured to be sexy, but if you DO feel sexy, go with it. Try different things. See what works.
Then tell/show your boyfriend.
Also, oil isn't the best lubricant in the world. Try something specially made for the job, a water-based lubricant. You can buy these in pharmacies or specialist shops.
Sexual problems could be about your history, your feelings about your current relationship, or any number of things. Pressure and anxiety related to sex will only make things more terrible. Why not take a break from sex and try cuddling and kissing instead?
Your boyfriend needs to let YOU lead the pace of things for awhile. If you've got the opportunity to take charge, you might surprise yourself.
Having a child shouldn't stop you from enjoying sex, although of course kids are a lot of work. But if you listen to your own heart and body, things should start to improve. Masturbate, explore, buy some books (or go to the library!), show your boyfriend where your clitoris is, focus on your emotional relationship.
Best of luck.
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